What Once Was Broken is Now Gold | Reed900 [Rewriting]

17. Take Control

"Stop looking at the damn thing," Gavin muttered, unable to tear his gaze from Nines.

Nines only laughed and drew Gavin closer to his side from where they sat on the couch, his thumb running over the flat of his new key, over the bumps of the cat keychain. "No." But he did tilt his head and glance to Gavin, their faces far too close. "Or, are you saying you'd rather have my attention on you?"

Gavin's breath caught in his throat. "W-what? Fuck no!" But he didn't pull away, didn't give Nines a reason to turn his attention to something else.

Nines pressed gentle kisses to Gavin's temple, down his cheek. "I love it, you know." He chuckled and squeezed Gavin's shoulder, letting out a content sigh. "I didn't realize me not having access to your home meant so much to you."

"I-I mean, we come home at about the same time anyway, it's no big deal. Just for emergencies." Gavin didn't need Nines to identify that lie, didn't need to be out of denial to spot his bullshit. "You have nowhere else to go."

Nines shrugged, his breath warm on Gavin's cheek. "I have plenty of places I could go, but nowhere else I'd like to be."

A thrum of warmth shot down Gavin's chest and he nodded, burying his face against Nines' collarbone. Nothing he could say could express his embarrassment, his gratitude, his relief. When Nines squeezed his prosthetic, Nines' fingers a smooth silver, Gavin realized he didn't have to say a word.

To anyone else, Gavin's apartment was silent save for the background noise of the TV and the impatient mewls of Jo as she bumped her head against Gavin's legs. But, to Gavin and Nines, they couldn't hear those other things at all.

Gavin could say he knew the basics of what an interface was. After all, he'd done that before, and not just with Nines. But...this. Gavin knew this was different. This was phantom feeling, phantom touch, a thought as conversation, a rush of feeling met with understanding deeper than words could convey. Gavin wasn't sure how much he showed to Nines, how much Nines showed to him, but when they broke the connection, Gavin felt as though a part of himself had broken off with him and a piece of Nines had come to replace it.

"I've wanted to do this for a long time," Nines whispered, his voice soft amongst the background noise. "I've wanted to show you the world you've opened yourself up to ever since I first connected with you."

"I don't wanna...." Gavin trailed off with a frown and curled up further against Nines' side.

Nines nodded and kissed the top of Gavin's head. "Rely too much on your prosthetic," he finished. "Which I don't quite understand."

Gavin drew in a slow breath, then focused his feelings out through his prosthetic, to Nines. Still, he was more used to words. "It's easier to take it away than my arm, I guess. Easier to break it, tear it off...." He sighed. "You know I'm only using it right now because of...you. Other than that, I should at least learn to be ambidextrous."

"You know what ambidextrous means?" Nines burst out a laugh when Gavin rammed his fist against Nines' gut. "Alright, alright. I understand, more or less." He rested his head back against the couch and let his fingertips wander through Gavin's hair. "You're thinking practice range? Perhaps we could visit there once we get off our break."

With a nod, Gavin said, "Sounds good." against Nines' chest. "I haven't written much, either. D'ya think that'd help?"

"Anything would." Nines tapped the prosthetic's fingertips and sent a trickle of pride through the connection. "Now shh, this episode's almost over."

With a nod, Gavin went quiet, his gaze going to the screen of his TV, though he focused on hearing Nines' steady heartbeat from where his ear pressed against Nines' chest. Gavin ran his prosthetic's thumb over the back Nines' hand, the slow thump of Nines' thirium pump almost like the low lull of a lullaby. His eyes slid shut, heavy, and Gavin didn't fight it.