During primitive days, a guy couldn't go to a girl without going through her father, and a long list of guys.
During the primitive days, you can't just hand over a condom to a girl and say, "I'll be gentle." but seriously, who uses condoms anymore? This generation's a tough one.
During the primitive days, you court a girl.
And I wonder why I never had a boyfriend. It's because of my high standards. Also, my seemingly abstruse mind, and my habit questions I ask that has no definite answer, and I always want the definite answer. It's my cliff-hanger mannerism. It's my esoteric stares. It's how invisible and indifferent I am.
It's me. It's always been me.
If I didn't have my few friends, my sister, and father, I would have been an insane introvert staying inside the house painting anything I see.
It's me. It's always been me.
When someone gets really attached to me, I push them away, but I don't want them to go. Do you understand how complicated that is?
It's like when someone starts to understand that I want someone to understand, I just distance them from me, because they might not understand, even if they want to.
Maybe because I don't understand myself at all, so how would they?
Or plainly, because I don't want them to.
He told me he wanted to understand me. I simply cannot let him do that. I want to understand myself first, before someone explains myself to me. I'm a very prideful person.
"No one understands." I uttered real slow with my monotone voice following an out breathed "why"
And he answers me..
"It's you. It's always been you."
