Lovely (Goodguyfitz X Reader) (A forever unfinished story)

{11}

I sat on the couch, close to Cameron as we watched Mason and Matt play Fortnite until their ubers got here. Mason held hands with Jay against the controller as he played. I had my head on Cameron's shoulder. Eric was almost asleep on the chair. Jaren came down the stairs.
"Alright boys, one of your ubers are here."
"That would be mine" Toby said as he motioned for Matt to come with him.
"Awe damn. I'll beat you later Mason." Matt said as he grabbed his phone and got dragged out the door by Toby.
A couple moments later, Mason left with no goodbyes or anything. He just, left. Eric and Jay had gone with him. So now it was just Jaren, me, John, and Cameron. Cameron sat in the guest bedroom across from mine, while John and Jaren were God knows where. I just kinda sat and listened to music. I listened to the song Cam had shown me in the car. I got some sort of nervous, but nice feeling in my stomach when I listened. It made me think of him. I took a deep breath to calm my nerves. I grabbed my Caramel Coffee from the table, taking a sip of it and putting it back. I sighed. I didn't feel sad, or anxious at all. I didn't feel overjoyed either. I just kinda felt calm, like everything was going my way today, for once. Cameron came downstairs and sat next to me.
"Hey." He smiled genuinely.
"Hey." I responded, leaving one earbud out as I sort of faced him.
"Can I listen?" He asked. Without any words, I handed him the earbud. He smiled brightly as he put it in.
"The song I showed you?" He asked knowingly.
"Yeah." I confirmed.
Cameron looked at me during the chorus of the song. He smiled as if he was telling me something from the song.
You are out of my league
Got my heartbeat racing
If I die don't wake me
'Cause you are more than just a dream
Those lyrics. It was weird. I felt as if I might've been exaggerating on the part of him basically telling me the words in the lyrics with that look.. But maybe I wasn't.
"Why are you smiling? I asked, trying my best not to sound rude or anything.
"Um.. Sorry, I don't know what-"
"No! It's not a bad thing! I don't mind. I don't get to see people smile often enough. It makes me happy to see you smile." I grinned. Eternally cringing at myself.
Jaren POV
"I just feel like once I give my all to someone, they're just gonna leave..." John cried. This was a normal thing for him. He'd have breakdowns like this almost every night. They were normally about his job, or stress.. But this one was different. It was about love. Specifically about losing someone he loves. Not losing them physically, but emotionally. I sat on his crossed legs and hugged him as he cried on my shoulder.
"Shh. It's ok." I comforted him.
"I just don't understand why I can't just let my feelings out for people.. I've tried.. So many times.. But she never gets the hints.." He sobbed.
She? Feelings? He has feelings for a girl? Oh.. Why would I ever think..
I hated myself for ever thinking he'd love me. Why would anyone? A tear left my eye onto John's back.
"Are you ok?" He sniffed, "why are you crying?" He asked as he squeezed me gently. I sniffed, trying to hide my pain.
"No.. I-I'm fine." My voice cracked.
"Jaren..?" John looked me in the eyes as a tear left his face, "why are you crying?"