A Simple History In Town

Chapter 5

After getting out of Charlotte's car and watching her leave, I directed myself to my house. When I arrived in front of my door and was about to search in my bag for my house keys, I immediately realized that I had left my bag in Charlotte's car. I was so panicked. I tried to run after her car, but this operation seemed quite impossible, taking in consideration my athletic level. I turned back to do door, looked down to the floor. I stood there for at least two minutes. It was almost ten o'clock. After standing there like an idiot, I decided to sit under the porch. I sat my back facing the door. I looked around, and only saw a drunkard trying to walk. He was so funny. He was zigzagging and was holding a billion bottles. I'm not kidding. He was holding so many bottles. Anyways, I observed him a bit closer and noticed that had the face of guy named Jeff. You know the guy that's always making bad jokes and trying to be cool and that is named Jeff. Well, that drunkard looked just like that.

After the Jeff-like-guy left, falling many times, I stayed there in the cold night trying to sleep. I guess that I fell asleep pretty quickly, caus' one of my neighbours was having a party,and loud and active music was on. I don't know why but loud and active music always me fall asleep, which is totally contradictory to its purpose.

The next morning, I woke up pretty easily. Even though it doesn't seem like it at all, I actually slept like a baby. Unfortunately I was, freezing cold and my position was not the best ever, my mind was at peace and I had a wonderful dream. I won't say any details about that dream, because it might be too vulgar for some people. I'll just say that a certain beautiful person (Charlotte) was present. Anyways, I guess that when I woke up it was around six, because the garbage truck (whatever you call that truck) always passed in front of mine house around six thirty. Knowing that I had time before going to work, I decided that I should head to the station. I approximately calculated that I had at least fifty minutes before the station opened. As usually, I decided to go to the Rimen coffee shop, and as usual I forgot that I had no money, no time, no car and no motivation whatsoever to go there. So I just walked to the police station. The problem is that my office is 25 kilometers away. I think that I had only walked five hundred meters before giving up. Thankfully there was an underground station nearby. But I still didn't have any money to buy a ticket. Anyways, I got to the underground and passed the security without any problem. I checked which subway I had to take and directed myself to the right platform. I had to wait for 25 minutes for the next subway to arrive. And then something happened. The type of thing everyone wants to avoid : Social interaction.

This woman and man were approaching. For these type of situation, as I said before, called social interaction, I have a rule: never do eye contact. Because if you do, things are going to get even more awkward. So this man and woman were walking towards me. When they finally got to me I was obliged to look at them. You could notice that they were either drunk or drugged. The woman had wrinkles of tiredness, and the man stepped away, went in a corner and started to urinate, quite disgusting. The woman started singing some song "My head is spinning, from smoking the chicken, the bass is kicking", she kept looking at me and repeating the sentence. But then she suddenly said "Hey mate do yiu know thise sung?", she had a super weird accent. I, in the other hand had turned my stare to the wall that was in the other platform. The woman got very vexed and said "Why ain't yiu respunding mate?". The man who had finished with his business came by. He took me by the collar and shoved me while saying "Don't yiu ever dare direspuct my woife!" Then as they had come, they left. I was left alone sitting on the fresh piss on the floor. I was kind of glad that they left. Because they were truly disturbing and disturbed. They really made me uncomfortable. Their accent, their physical appearance, basically their way of being was so DIS-TUR-BING. They really freaked me out. Two minutes after this incident, the subway arrived. I entered it and sat, for there was no one. My trip lasted at least thirty minutes. During this "trip" I saw many people pass. But one of them deeply marked me. It was a kid. A little girl who was about sixteen years old and that was dressed as a popular girl. She had blond, long, flat hair that resembled to a wig. Then after observing a bit more, I thought that she looked just like Regina George from Mean Girls. The exact same waist, hair, face, eyebrows, and way of walking. Then I started thinking what would the girl become when she would grow up. And this what I was planning for her : I guessed that she will work at Walmart with a salary of five hundred dollars per month. I'm not criticising Walmart's staff. I'm just saying that when you work at Walmart you don't really have a good reputation and sometimes you don't even have a reputation at all.

After getting off the subway, I directed myself to the police station. Everything was fine, until that stupid secretary Norma gave me her negative and stressed vibe, by saying "Patrick, you are late as hell". And you already know that being late to work is my worst nightmare. I'd prefer to eat poop or lick a dog's ass hole than arriving late to work. I looked Norma trying not to show my panic. Then I went to my cubicle, I sat, and did nothing. I was silent. I could not imagine that I, me, Patrick Bravecci, had arrived late to work. Then I realised that I had not checked the time. I look at the clock hanging on the wall behind me. It was ten. Then I realised that on Wednesdays ( because it's wednesday) the garbage truck passes at ten past eight. Anyways my silent time was interrupted by a magnificent voice:

"Johnny Abatti!"

"Stop calling me that Charlotte"

"Shut up, you dork" she ordered, "where's my croissant?"

"I am the one that should ask you something : where's my bag?" I asked

"This?" she said while shaking my bag in front of my face, "at first I thought it was an immense potato. It's so ugly. I think it's the ugliest bag I have ever seen in my entire life."

"Thank God you have it"

"Anyways, where is my croissant?"

"What croissant?" I asked bewildered

"The one you promised me to buy in exchange for a ride. You know that croissant?" Charlotte said as if it was obvious.

After this sentence I immediately recalled my promise.

"I'm sorry." I said, a bit ashamed.

"Don't you even have an excuse?"

"Well, yes, in fact I do have one. I left my stuff in your car."

"At least it is a satisfying excuse, but as a punishment you'll have to buy me three more croissants."

She was exaggerating. Three more croissants! She's crazy. For a moment I started to hate her. But this feeling went away once James passed next to my next cubicle, so I could compare the feeling I had for Charlotte in that moment to the feeling I always had when I saw James everytime.

"I'm not buying you three croissants! I mean, one croissant is 2.45 dollars, and you want three! That makes 7.35 dollars." I complained.

"Well that's a good price considering the fact that I had to endure the horrible smell of your bag and your presence"

"Okay. You have a point" I finally admitted.

She left and I was left alone with my bag in my arms. I checked the inside of my bag to see if anything had been stolen. Nothing was taken, nothing had changed, just like my relationship with Charlotte hadn't changed.