Bossman

Chapter 4

"I don't know, Holls. I don't fucking know.", Cassandra was trying with all of her might not to cry. "I'm sure there's an explanation, Cass. He wouldn't have just left". Cassandra stood up and walked to the window with her hands on her hips. One of her hands came up to her face and cupped her cheek. "I should have seen it coming. I shouldn't have fucking told him". The tears were spilling now. "Don't say that. You know you wouldn't have been able to go much longer with him believing a lie.". It was silent for a few moments, each one feeling like an eternity. "Your right". Cassandra turned to face Holly, and she held it all in long enough for one more sentence, or as close as she could get. "How could I have been so stupid to love him?".
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   Never in my entire fuck-fest of a mind, would I have thought that I would be here right now. I hadn't realized I was shaking until someone had asked what that noise was. It was my metal chair rubbing against the floor. I had glanced at the mirror, and my eyes quickly returned to it. My cheeks were more red and puffy than I had ever seen them. I was a wreck. Even I could recognize the look on my face. The one that screamed I had seen a ghost.
   "Alright everyone, out. I don't care where you go, just away from the kitchen.", I almost flinched at his voice. Not because it scared me. But because of how much I had missed it, and here it was. I just didn't know how to feel. My eyes darted to the table, refusing to look up. I tried to stop fidgeting, but my hands would be viciously toying with each other before I could notice.
   Everyone had left the first floor within a minute after he spoke. I could hear him walking into the room, and I tensed up. It caught up to me. Bossman. That was his username on one of the various things we talked on. I felt the table move as he sat down across from me. I could tell he was looking straight at me. I still refused to look at him. I wouldn't dare give him the satisfaction. "Look at me". Goddamnit.
   His voice alone could always make me kill for him. I had to catch my breath, before I even realized tears were rolling down my face impatiently. Sure, I had seen him before. We had even FaceTimed. But this. This was different. Everything from his brownish red hair, to those puppy eyes. Just months ago, this exact moment was all I had hoped for. I just would have preferred it without being kidnapped. He looked at me, and I looked at him. And that's how it remained for quite some time.
  "I suppose you have questions?". I didn't budge. I didn't know how to, I had forgotten everything inside of my head. "Cass". "Don't call me that". I didn't mean for that to sound as sharp and vicious as it did. He slightly smiled. "I want to know everything, Luke. I want to know where and why I'm here. I want to know what the fuck You want from me.". I stood up and threw my hands up. "I want to know what the hell is going on!". His eyes followed me, although he didn't budge. He turned to face me. "This is our home. Outskirts of Aurora, Colorado. I don't want anything from you. You know that. And deep down, you know why your here.". "Don't fucking play games with me! I want to go home. Let me go home.". "I can't let you do that, Cassie. Your sorta missing now".              
    "Besides, those aren't the questions you want answers to, and we both know it". I stopped coldly in my spot and I couldn't help but stare at him. Those eyes, those lips. They were once my biggest desire, I guess they still are. Damn straight I had other questions. "Fuck this". I shook my head and started to walk out, until his hand was wrapped around my wrist. "Your not going anywhere, Cass.".
  He wasn't hurting me. And somehow, I knew he wouldn't. I turned to face him. All I wanted was to wrap my arms around him. Instead, I shook my arm away from him and walked back to the table. I sat down and looked forward, waiting for him to sit down.
  It took me a few seconds to prepare. If I didn't, my voice would crack and I would erupt into a sobbing mess. "Forget all of this.." I had to swallow. "Why did you leave?". I watched as his expression changed. I couldn't tell what it meant. "It's a long story. One that I need you to be..Open about.". Each of his words were sincere and careful. That's the only reason I wasn't crying, running, or pissed off. I should be doing all of those things right now. I shouldn't be sitting here. I should be waking up from this dream.
  "Throughout all of the time that you and me were together, every time we talked, I did not put on an act. I need you to know that. I gave you all of me, and leaving you was the hardest thing I've ever done.". He seemed like he was thinking about his next words. "Cassie, I'm not exactly who you think I am. I am the 'owner', we'll call it that for now, of an organization. And we don't do good things.". I felt my heart drop. "What things do you do?". He bit the inside of his lip. "Things that you would see in the news. We take part in special trades and transactions. We take assignments. And almost all of us have done the unspeakable.".
   I should have stopped this. I should have gotten up and ran. I should have. "And the reason that I had to leave you was that someone very dangerous was looking into us. And any.. Loose ends would be tied up.". I didn't need to ask any more questions. I knew what was going on now. You know how in all of those cliche bad boy movies, how they 'claim' a girl. I've been claimed. My mind immediately pieced things together. All of those times I was sure there was someone close, someone watching me. There was. 
  I only had one last question. The only one that meant everything to me. There was no use in asking about getting out of here, what was going on. I got the feeling I wouldn't be leaving anytime soon. "I just have one last question.". He nodded and I slowly started. I looked at him dead in the eyes. "Have you ever really... Do you love me?".
-
   I had already processed everything, I just didn't know how to feel about all of it. I sat on what was apparently our bed. Luke said he had some paperwork, and he'd be upstairs soon. I was looking down at my hands, which were still fidgeting. His words kept flowing through my mind. They just added to the insanity that I was thinking of. What if this is good? What if I give it a chance? No. Stop it.
  I've just been told that he didn't really leave. He held onto me. He waited for me. I was wrong, he did care. We had kept talking, and I figured some things out. Given his situation, he has known just about everything about me before he even left. He had men stationed to watch over me. Which, in some odd way was comforting. My mind kept going to one place, and was influenced by his answer to that one damn question.
    I sighed and hopped up onto my feet. I started to slowly pace around. I didn't know how to feel. I just knew a few things, and they were pretty fucked up. Number one, I was away from that horrid excuse for a town. I was away from having to deal with my mother. I don't have to fix her messes here. Number two, I had just about the biggest relief of my entire life. He did love me. He didn't want to leave. And here he is, with me.
  Now it's just up to me. Do I want to try and get away, do I want to find a phone? Do I want to try like hell to get home. Or do I want to stay here? In this home that seems oddly safe. The home that includes the man I love, whether I want to admit it or not, who I thought had been ripped away from me. I know what your thinking, get the hell out of there. But I don't know. I had this gut feeling that I had found something, and that I shouldn't let it go.
  The door opened and I turned around sharply to see who it was. It was him. It made me happy. As silly as it was, I felt that he was going to disappear. And he didn't. "I brought you a marshmallow coke." He said with a half smile. I caught myself mid smile. He always was sweet, he made sure I had everything I could want. He would send me presents. Order me pizzas, no matter how mad he knew it made me. I mentally slapped the smile off of my face. "Thank you" I said as I took the cup.
  He sat down on the bed, and turned to face me. I sat down on a chair that was behind me. I swirled the marshmallow inside of my coke as there was silence filling the room. I looked up at him just as his eyes turned to me. "I guess I have a question now. I need to know what your planning on doing here. Are you going to fight like hell to get out of here, because I have no doubt in my mind that it would take a lot to contain you." He sorta chuckled, and it was enough to make me loose my mind. "Or are you wanting to stay. To be here, and be us. And fall in love with this family here. To be with me?".
  I looked down. I knew, deep down, and maybe even everywhere. But I knew what my answer was. And I couldn't lie to him. I just couldn't. I looked back up at him. "Luke...".
Before I could finish, a rather happy voice came to the door, and knocked a few times. Whoever it was didn't wait for a response. "Cass! Your finally here!". I felt like my eyes were going to pop out of my head with as wide as they had grown. My soda fell out
Of my hands as I sprang up to my feet. I couldn't believe what I was seeing, Who was in front of me. "Holly?".