Sky Full of Thoughts

letting go

She's not the one, anymore.

The beginning

I sit in complete darkness, only the screen from my phone lighting up my face, revealing the heavy sleeping bags under my eyes. My eyes fight to keep the brown colour as the red lines are conquering the only colour left in me. I read the text messages that once brought a smile to my face, trying not to let the tear in my eye escape and roll down my cheek, my soft cheek. The butterflies slowly die as I begin to become numb to the feeling. I look up and whisper in agony "she was the one"

The middle

Weeks drag by and you've moved on, it didn't take long but you look happier, only creating a resentful feeling inside towards the guy. Too in love to see what you did wrong, too blind to see that you're to blame.

The end

Months fly by and my mind thinks about other stuff rather than you. I go to bed and dream about things that please the soul, not you. Since we last spoke you allowed the tongues of two guys enter your mouth, trying to fill the empty void you left in your own soul. You search in any guy something that I gave you, realising that they cant give it to you. You come back to me, on your knees insisting you didn't do the right thing and you just weren't sure what you wanted. I think about it at first but then I look back at the broken guy I once was, thinking you were the one. In that moment I realised you were the one, the one that thought me to not settle for less and in that harsh but glorious moment I turn you away. I turn down what I once was my future.

Her actions allowed me to see clearly. She caused many tears to be shed but the water cleared my vision allowing me to let go of someone I thought I could never let go off, a somebody I thought my heart would never move on from.

People change and it allows us to move on. I once loved the person you were but that person doesn't exist anymore so I am incapable to love something that doesn't exist. I used to try and get over you but now I take a glimpse at you out of the corner of my eye and I instantly despise you. I don't despise you for leaving me but despise you for thinking you had the right and courage to mess with me when all I wanted was to bring a smile to your face. I used to love who you were, but you don't exist anymore, alongside my love.

Thank you Lia.