At school there are a few rumors going around about me and its hard to deal with. One of those rumors are that i'm a cheater and therefore eliminates all chances of ever finding love. This has gone around for a while now ever since the whole thing with Cam and Ash happend. However I have only cheated once and I owned up to it. Other than that one time that was accidental I have never cheated in my life, not relationship wise just on like homework and games, nothing harmful. I regret a lot of things but the think i regret most is not treating people like Ashley or Cambrie better so that we could all get along.
The second rumor is that I talk with 7th graders and little girls. People say that i'm a creep and that i'm a pedophile. All I want are close friends that I can talk to about anything. That's why I don't have friends anymore. Part of it is because they believe rumors about me and because i'm personally pushing them away. Every "friend" I have turns on me, hurts me, or I hurt them. My closest friend I have is named Skylier. Skylier is a freshman one grade below me. I let her wear my sweatshirt because shes cold and shes my closest friend.
I arrived to my third hour class and she was outside of the door. I asked for my jacket back and she said that she was gonna give it to me anyways. At first I thought nothing of it, although a little surprised I took back the jacket. The next thing she said to me felt like a boulder ran over me. "Emily is mad that i'm wearing it anyways" she said, I wondered why, maybe Emily was jealous... i could only hope so " she said ewe you're wearing the jacket of a child rapist" Sky said about Emily. I wanted to lay down and die right there, i felt empty and alone even though there were hundreds of kids around. I felt the loneliness I have ever felt in my life and even while i'm typing this I still feel that way.
The point of life isn't clear at all anymore. I thought I was happy and that I could finally feel free. Then Cambrie left my life, at first I felt that i could be fine because I still had Ashley by my side and I was so happy. I had the most beautiful girl in the world as my girlfriend, I loved her so much. I loved her so much that I would die for her. Then she left me. I still feel empty and suicidal and no body but one or two people can actually help. Those two people are Ashley, because I can be super open and honest with her about everything. The second girl is named Ava. Ava is this short girl with naturally dirty blond hair, but is now dyed a dark red. Ava has super cute freckles and an amazing voice like an angels'.
