Episode #313 Resolved

Option B, Part 1

Cyrus' POV

I drop my backpack on the floor as I enter my house from school.

"Cyrus?" My mom calls from the kitchen when she notices me. "How was your day? How did the costume turn out?"

"Good," I lie.

I wait by the door for a few more seconds, trying to recollect myself and stop the tears that threaten to fall at the thought of TJ.

"Do you have the spaghetti strainer?" she asks. "I'm washing the dishes right now."

"Yeah," I reply.

I unzip my bag and pull out the strainer, then bring it over to my mom whose hands are deep in a sink of soap bubbles.

"Thanks, honey," she says as I set it down on the counter next to the rest of the dirty dishes.

"You're welcome," I respond.

I stay there for a moment, trying to form the words I want to say.

"Is everything okay?" my mom asks.

"Everything's fine," I say, my voice sounding like I'm on the verge of tears, which I guess I am.

I continue to watch her wash the dishes for a bit longer. Trying to force the words out feels like trying to fit a piano through a window.

"Mom?" I say.

"Yes?" she responds while scrubbing at a greasy plate.

"You know how I like baby taters?"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah, well, I also like boys."

Her hands freeze in the middle of washing, then she drops the plate back into the sink and turns to look at me.

"Cyrus, honey," she says with a gentle voice, "I love you just the same, no matter who you like. You know that, right?"

I don't know why I'm crying. I'm not sad. Whatever held the tension in my chest must've also been holding in the tears, because they both let loose together and I have to wipe my wet cheeks as I speak my next words.

"Thanks, Mom."

She wraps her arms around me, her hands still damp from the soapy water. A wave of relief comes over me, and I let out the breath I've been holding in.

"I'm so proud of you," she says as she lets me go. "It takes a lot of courage to come out, especially to your parents. I would know."

"What do you mean?" I ask, wondering what I'm missing.

"Honey, I never told you this because it wasn't relevant to anything, but I'm bi."

Shocked, my jaw drops, splitting into a giant smile.

"Really?"

"Yeah," she confirms. "And if you think coming out to your parents is hard, imagine coming out to your kid."

She lets out a small laugh, then leans her elbow on the counter.

"So is there any particular boy you like?" she asks with a grin.

"Mom," I groan, not wanting to mention TJ after what happened today. I don't even know if he still wants to talk to me, let alone likes me that way. Besides, I think I'll start crying again if I talk about him.

"Okay, okay, fine. But if you ever want to talk about that—or anything—I'm always going to listen."

I nod and smile at her before hopping down off the stool.

"Thanks," I breathe one last time before departing toward the stars.

When I get to my room, I pull out my phone and notice a notification. I'm disappointed when I realize that it's just Buffy sending a text to the group chat. Still nothing from TJ.

_________________________________________

TJ's POV

The bang of the ball against the backboard echoes throughout the empty gymnasium. I came here to clear my head, but all I can think about is the look on Cyrus' face when he saw my costume with Kira. I did that to him. I keep missing my shots for the net, the ball bouncing away in different directions. He's even getting in the way of me playing basketball. How am I supposed to move on from him? Why did I have to like him? Why can't I just be normal?

I take another throw, but the ball rebounds right back to me. In my state of stress, I chuck the ball across the gym with all my strength, but that still doesn't help release the anger I'm feeling toward myself.

"Woah," I hear a voice say. "Angry much?"

I turn around to see Buffy catch the ball and stroll toward me. On her way, she takes a shot for the net and it swishes directly in.

"So you decided against the costume with Cyrus, huh?" she says as she passes the ball back to me.

Immediately after catching it, I tuck the ball under my arm and start to walk away. I know she's just going to yell at me, and I don't need to her to hate me. I can do that all on my own.

"Why?" she asks. "I thought you and Cyrus were really good friends."

I stop to turn back to her once more, saying, "Yeah, well, not anymore. Pretty sure Cyrus won't ever want to talk to me again."

She raises an eyebrow. "And who's fault is that?"

I shake my head and start to leave again, but she stops me by continuing to talk.

"Why did you do a costume with Kira instead?"

I whip back around and shout, "Because I'm not going to do some matching couples costume with a guy! I'm not gay!"

The word echoes back a few times, stinging me deeper with every wave. I don't want to be gay.

Then Buffy responds gently, "You know it's okay if you are, right?"

Another thump rings out as I chuck the ball to the ground to give it to Buffy. Her hands interrupt its bounce, closing in around it.

"You can have the court," I say. "That's what you came for, right?"

I storm out as fast as I can. I know it's okay for people to be gay. I know that. But I never thought I'd be the one who's gay. I just always assumed that if I was going to be scared, it would be of someone else. I never considered the possibility that I could be this scared of myself.