To my first love.

Reminiscing.

To my First Love,

Thank you for everything.
I'm very thankful that you came into my life, even though you didn't stay.

Naalala mo pa ba? 8th March 2017, the day when everything started with that "ciao ate". From that chat nagsimula ang mga usapan, biruan, kulitan, laro ng ML hanggang madaling araw.

Noon, ang turing sayo ay kaibigan lang, hindi inakala na magkakaroon ng "ikaw at ako".
Ngayon, ang turingan ay pang estranghero, hindi inaakala na mawawala ang "ikaw at ako" at mabubuo ang "ikaw at sya".

Naalala mo pa ba? 3rd June 2017, the day when we saw each other for the first time. I have never believed in love at first sight until that day. I remember it very well. I was being silly with my friends when they told me to look back because there were two pinoys coming to us. I looked back and I saw you. I saw you and suddenly nagka-slowmotion. I still remember how you walked toward me, how you looked at me and how you introduced yourself "James Reid nga pala." I still remember your eyes, your smile, your laugh which I really miss. I can't really explain how I felt but I knew it. From that moment I knew that my life will never be the same.
I still remember how you always tried to get close to me then, how you tried to take my hand while I was walking but unfortunately there was the electric shock. That electric shock I hated. But maybe it was the sign. It was the sign that you and I must be apart. It was the sign that our hands should never meet. It was the sign that I avoided.
I thought that electric shock could be instead that spark needed to start a relationship with you, which happened few weeks later.

Our relationship wasn't perfect. But for me you were more than perfect. You are my ideal guy that I never thought I could met.

On 2015 I wrote this somewhere:

"Ideal man ko? Yung sweet, may sense of humor, laging nasa tabi pag malungkot or masaya, mabait syempre. Someone who thinks I'm special, worth time, and faithful. Someone who wouldn't give up and would keep trying, and not just get bored and leave. Ok lang sa akin kung hindi sya ganun ka gwapo. Mas okay nga yun walang kaagaw:"). Preferably taller than me, pero kung hindi okay lang! Mas gusto ko yung maalam magbasketball or badminton or rugby. Yung maalam magguitar, yung kakantahan ka nya kahit sintunado pa sya..."

And two years later... you came. Lahat ng hinahanap ko nasayo. You're a medium build boy with a tanned skin, handsome with a pure heart and you really can sing. You have it all. But you were not that "someone who thinks I'm worth it... someone who wouldn't give up and would keep trying". You gave up on us. But I don't blame you. I think it was the best choice tho.. But sometimes hindi ko maiwasan maalala kung anong meron tayo noon.
We were so perfect. We WERE.

You are the Boy version of me. You love food as much as I do. You love Harry Potter as much as I do. You like mythology as much as I do. You like reading wattpad as much as I do. You like playing mobile games (ML, ROS, PUBG) as much as I do.
I like watching KDrama and anime because of you.
I enjoyed everything we did together.

As a boyfriend, you were amazing. You were very sweet and caring. You did efforts too. But sometimes, I admit it, I really hated you and you know why.

Despite all those flaws of yours, I still thought that you were the best and the only boy I wanted to grow old with.

You were my first and I was hoping that you would also be my last.

But now you're dreaming to grow old with another girl.

. . .