[AngeLuz]

[Outro: Does That Makes Sense?]

warning beforehand: this chapter is somber, gloomy, tenebrific, whatever fits. I already warn you before entering this story (if you even read the summary till the end) but i want to warn you once again just in case, because this chapter might've been triggering for you, if this story haven't already.

Have a nice day!

_-_

So hear me out, okay?

Let me tell you something i never said.

I have trust issues.

Cliché, right? So what is the big deal?

So, it means, i couldn't trust people easily.

Because if i do, i would probably be used and then thrown away afterwards.

Believe me, I speak from experience.

Nobody wished for me to live.

Not my family, or whoever concieved me.

Not my friends, or even my bestest friend.

And no, i'm not just being a seven year old brat and whining about it.

What could be my reason to stay in this world?

I'm sick of it all.

How my pathetic self always fall to temptation despite knowing it will break me afterwards.

How i always try to act fine when i'm not.

How nothing of me is real anymore.

I despise it.

I hate it.

I hate how people see me in their narrow point of view.

How people give me weird looks for slicing my hands,

For wearing long sleeved shirts in the summer,

For gulping down the pills dryly without water, trying to be fast enough so people won't notice.

For looking like a zombie every single day,

.

For just being what i am.

I'm scared, desperate, and craving for attention that i never receive. Not in the way i wanted to.

So i decided to go away from this world.

I had planned a perfect trip to another world, just me, my miserable self and i.

And just at the moment of my final decision, a guy break through and ask me to live with him.

My whole body agreed, and it takes a lot of willpower not to run into his embrace and cry. Luckily, my pride and ego stopped me from doing so.

I'm happy, ecstatic even. Towards this man whom i hardly know before this accident.

Somebody just ask me to live for them.

He is willing to be my source of life. And maybe even be leeched by me.

It doesn't matter who they are, as long they don't throw me away when they're bored.

And besides, if he did get bored of me, the more reason to jump, right?

I could enjoy whatever he's offering to me, before he decided to leave me again.

Or if i'm lucky, he will stay.

There's no harm in trying, isn't it?

I got nothing else to lose.

.