Double Star.

8: Almost a Kiss.

PoV Sarah:

- "Jordan ? ". I can't believe that the person standing in front of me is none other than my childhood friend and my old classmate ''Jordan Smith". My thoughts are lost in the noise of the steps and discussions that the students are making in the halls. Maybe I'm dreaming?

- "No you're not dreaming, it's REALLY me !". Oh no, he heard me. His voice sounded sad and angry at the same time and that's when my memory reminded me. I abandoned him, he wanted to know about me and I rejected him. Too hurt and fearful, I couldn't face anyone after my parents' death, so I just wanted to forget about anyone who has been in my life and start another one, meet people who won't look at me with pity every time I talk to them. But it seems that I was wrong, with my lame and shameful attitude, I ended up breaking a relation that could've last forever.

- "I...sorry". I know that my low pitiful voice won't erase my bad behavior towards him but I just said it, hoping that it would...somehow. He got closer to me until the distance that separated us reduced to a few inches and then in an instant, he hugged me.

-" Sarah...". He sighed, "I am not mad at you ". These few words warmed my heart. I knew that he wouldn't be angry at me, that he would try to understand me and forgive me cause, after all, I faced the most difficult period in my life but, was he responsible? Surely not and that makes me realize that I am a selfish coward who believes that whenever she tries to speak out, no one could hear or understand her, always trying to break away from people and abandoning them on the road, without any clear reason. 

- "So, how's life ? I haven't seen you in a while. You seem to be well, you know what ? Allison and Anna were missing you so much that they were always talking about you".  He declared, putting his hands on my shoulders. Allison and Anna? And I was the one thinking that they won't even remember my name when I'll leave.

- "And you know, I missed you too". He confessed, scratching his neck. His cheeks turned red and I couldn't help but find him cute and smiled.

- "By the way, I ...". He stopped suddenly, looking in my eyes with hesitance then looked nervously around him because of the prying eyes. I dragged Jordan with me, away from the too-curious and intrusive sights. 

- "What are you doing here Jordan ? ". I finally asked in a quiet corner.

- "Well you see, after the ...death of...your parents, I wanted to know about you, I called you but you didn't answer me, I even came to your house but you refused to open the door to me. At first, I didn't understand why you were doing this to me, we were friends for a long time, and everything was going right between us, so why didn't you want to talk to me ?! I asked myself that so many times and I knew later that you needed time to put the past behind you, so I left you alone. And I convinced myself that you would come to class, someday. But when I heard that you left us, I ... I couldn't face it. I wanted to see you at any price. So I came here, to the same school as you. I joined you for the only reason to tell you this Sarah". I listened to him carefully and didn't interrupt him, I could tell by the tone he employed that he is hurt and my eyes couldn't look at his', probably cause of the guilt.

- "Tell me what Jordan ? ".

- "I love you, Sarah! ". I winked many times not understanding the situation immediately but when I met his hazel eyes, staring at me intensely, I somehow understood his feelings. 

Jordan is in love with me!

- "I tried to forget you, I swear, but it was impossible. I couldn't stop thinking about you. I had to see you, to tell you". His words left me speechless and I couldn't look at him especially when his stare is getting more persistent. I don't want to reject him and hurt his feelings but...How can I explain to him that I don't feel the same about him? I didn't even expect him to come to see me, I thought that I won't meet him, at least for a long moment, and seeing him coming out of nowhere and telling me that he loves me makes me feel worse than anything.