little dragonfly

part 20

When the police entered, I was over my father's body with the baby crying in my arms, saying no to move myself a centimetre from him, but I heard his voice.

- Alice! Oh my God, are you okey? Did he hurt you?

- yes, yes, he did.

He hugged me from behind and started looking for bruises or whatever but I stopped him, separated from my father for first time and put his face in my hands.

- no, Justin this time he hurt me by killing himself.

He didn't say anything, just kissed my front and hugged me like he had never did before.

I was outside, Justin apologized for leaving us, but he had to stay in the hospital, so I was there, sat in the ground.

- Pssssttt...

I turned my face, behind some trees was Elise. I moved closer to her.

- what are you doing here? They can see you.

- I know.

- Where have you been?

- I've been here all time. I like Justin.

- he's great. But it's just another dangerous problem.

- what? I'm lost now.

- I'm trying to say, that if you let a lot of people enter in your life, they can also leave and hurt you.

- let me tell you a story and then you think about what you've just said.

I looked at her.

- so, I don't know if you saw it when you searched me but I had a daughter, then one year later, I met the man of my life, Josh, we were totally in love, and the baby didn't seem a problem for him, till one day.

She breathed slowly and carried on.

- one day, he arrived at home, five guys were with him, pointing with guns at him. My daugther was staying just next to me, and I tried to protect her. I asked him what was going on, and he said that he had done something bad at them.
They didn't want money, they gave a gun to my husband, and told him to choose one of us, me or my daughter, and to kill it.
He burst in tears, I yelled at him that he had to kill me, that he had to.
He looked at me, said that he loved me, I closed my eyes but when I opened them again I realized that my daughter was the one dead.

- oh my God, Elise, you don't know how sorry I am.

- it's been a long time.

- do you see him?

- no, I wouldn't be able to see him and to not kill him.

- but he loved you that much..

- no, Alice, I don't think he did. Because he knew that that baby was everything for me.
He was just selfish.

I nodded and hugged her.

We kept talking for a while but the police wanted me to explain how things went, so I said bye to Elise. She was a fugitive.

I was in the hospital, Justin was in a wheelchair, with his hands on mines.

- okai, then if I understood it correctly, your point of escaping from the police, WITHOUT ME, was just for having back the baby?

- yeah... are you mad at me ?

- I can't get mad at you, I'm just trying to understand why the hell my girlfriend does not ask me before doing things like that.

- what do you mean?

- alice, you have scaped from the police minimoum 3 times in less than a year.

- oh, that.

He kissed me.

- yes, that.

- don't you hate me even a little bit?

- I hate myself for not being able to hate you, even a little bit.

I smiled and hugged him.

- then when are you suppose to get better from that head of yours?

- oh, this little brain is so dramatic, you knew?

- it is? Oh, then take your time...

We were looking at each other smiling.

- Justin.

- yes?

- even the money that you spent on our dates were from the police, I wanted to give back your favour.

- what?

- let's say that this afternoon, you have a date with this girl.

- uhm... yeah? I don't see any girl here.

- dumb ass.

- and where are we going?

- oh, I've just forgot.

- sure you have.

I've planed a kind of plan, police let me stay a week free while they searched me a family. And I had to try to not waste it.

We got a taxi and went to the beach.

- noisy, where are we?

- you are not blind yet, see it by yourself.

He looked at the window and put a smile.

- oh, noisy, I love it!

- let's go! But... uhm do you think you are going to need the wheelchair?

- we are going to move a lot?

- I'm going to move, you are staying in the sand.

- then, I don't need it.

- perfect.

We were in the sand, looking the waves break, and I stood up.

- where are you going?

- stay here.

- hey, noisy don't go..

I started moving.

- Aliceee!!!

I laughed.

I went back with our favourite Starbucks.

- oh, alice, thank you!

- yeah.

I sat in front of him, so that he had to look at me.

- Justin.

- yeah???

- I'm afraid that we cannot be like we were anymore.

- what?

- I mean, I know it was just a week, and that now things seem to be easier, but....
It's not as in the first time that we met, now is different.

- and you don't like it now?

- no, no. I actually do. I do like us.
I feel that I love you more than ever, but that it's diferent.

- I know what you mean. And it's different because, now we know each other, and there are no secrets.
And it's not easy because we are still learning how to love, and...

I kissed him with all my mind on it and smiled, simeled like the really happy I was.

- you know what? I don't care, I don't need to know why, I just need to know I love you.