Sucker For You | Jonas Brothers

Chapter 2

The next day I pace back and forth in my apartment, waiting for Joe to arrive so we can go on our walk. I pick up my phone for the twentieth time, thinking of a lie i could text to him to cancel. But i can't bring myself to. I want to hangout with him. I have to hangout with him. I can't just stop my feelings for him, as much as i know i should.

A knock on the door makes me jump. I take a deep breath and shove my cell phone in the back pocket of my ripped jeans. I almost trip over the converse on my own feet as I make my way to the door. I look through the peep hole and it's him. His face is freshly shaved, the stubble from yesterday gone and his hair is still a mess of short curls.

I take a deep breath and open the door. He smiles wide and i smile back. "Hey there." he says.

"Hi Joe." I say and i can feel my heart start to race. How after all these years can he still have this affect on me? God i wish he didn't.

"Ready?" he asks and i nod before taking a step out towards him and shutting my door behind me.

We don't say much on our way to get our drinks. He opens the door for me as we enter the run down gas station and i fill two large cups with the cold cherry ice. I take a long sip and get an immediate brain freeze, making him laugh. When i'm finally over it i glare at him, "I'm glad my pain amuses you."

He laughs again and punches my arm gently, "You always do that."

"Do what?" I ask as we exit the store and start walking towards the train tracks.

"Drink too fast and get a brain freeze. You've done it since you were a kid."

I shrug, "It just tastes so good i can't help it." I say and we both laugh.

We walk on the train tracks, sipping our drinks in silence. I can feel the awkwardness in the air around us. I want to say i don't know why, but i can tell things have changed now that he has gotten engaged. Maybe he is doing this as our last hurrah? Maybe he is going to tell me we can't be friends anymore. Suddenly my stomach starts to hurt, and the drink looses its flavor.

"So, are you sure you are okay with Jenny and I being engaged?" He asks suddenly, throwing me off guard.

"Of course." I lie. What am i going to say? No it's not okay because i'm in love with you? He doesn't expect that answer, he just wants to know if i approve. You know, friends looking out for each other and all that.

"Really?" He says, looking at me as he takes a long sip from his straw.

"Yes. Jenny's a good girl." I say, because it's true. As much as i wish i could hate her, i don't.

"I'm glad. I care about what you think." he says and i know he means that.

"I know." I say, "You are getting married. Wow, i guess we are old." I say, trying to lighten the mood. I would do anything to be able to run away from him right now and not look back. But i know i would never have that kind of will power when it comes to him. I could never stay away.

He laughs, "Yeah, i guess so."

"I miss being a kid." I admit, "Things were a lot simpler." I say, like when i didn't have to worry about you marrying someone, i think to myself.

"Yeah, they were. We have such great memories together." he says. I nod in agreement but i realize he isn't looking at me, so he didn't see.

"We do." I say out loud.

We cut through the woods and end up at the river, a popular swimming hole in our small town. There's graffiti on the rocks and a pile of half burnt wood from a recent fire, beer cans littered around it.

I take a seat on a large rock that is halfway in the water and hang my feet over, careful not to get my shoes wet.

Joe takes a seat beside me, keeping a good amount of distance in between us. We have hugged here and there of course, but never had an intimate moment between us. Never even an accidental hand touch or something cliche like that.

God, i am so pathetic. He wants nothing to do with me romantically, and i fantasize about what it would feel like for him to hold my hand, or to brush his lips against mine. Just thinking about it now gives me goosebumps.

"I'm sure Jenny will ask you to be a bridesmaid." He says and my stomach flips. God i hope not.

"Right." i say and pray he doesn't talk about the wedding anymore, and he doesn't. We spend the rest of our time talking about memories of us when we were younger. And for a moment it feels like we are back in high school and everything is so much simpler. The sun starting to set brings us back to reality and i remember that he is engaged, and he will never be mine, causing my chest to tighten.

When we get back to my place, he stops at the door. "I had a great time tonight Trin. I really needed this."

This is it, this is when he says we can't be friends and we will never hang out again.

"We will have to do this again soon." he says, surprising me.

"Oh." i say, "Yes, definitely." I continue.

He brings me in for a hug. I assume it will be one of his normal, short hugs. I'm about to move away from him but he doesn't let me go. I freeze, unsure of what to do so i just tighten my grip and we stay like that for a few more moments. I pray he didn't feel my rapid heartbeat as he pulls away.

He looks down at me with soft eyes, "Goodnight Trin." he says and with that he walks away and all i can feel is the warmth from his body still on mine.