Always (Jumin X Zen)

Chapter 8

|Things Must Always|
|Have a Beginning|

Provided with clothes by the hospital to leave in, Zen gets dressed slowly, his mind wandering.

Prescribed with new pills and constant therapy appointments, Zen was surprised he wasn't stuck in a mental hospital; he wasn't sure he'd make it through this again if he was.

The albino's thoughts trail towards his past, his breathing becoming unsteady at the thoughts before he shakes himself out of his momentary trance.

He knew dwelling on it would only hurt him more. Zipping up the provided hoodie, Zen finally sits again, sighing softly. He rubs his tired eyes before looking up and staring blankly at the window across from him.

It seemed as if he was in an artificial cool in the hospital's blank white room, its air heated to just the right temperature, lights too bright, walls too white; it was all too perfect. But outside, the bare trees would sway in the wind at odd times, the remainder of their leaves torn off by the wind of autumn. The cooling air and weak sunlight peaking through the clouds hinted at the nearing of winter; a new ending as well as a new beginning.

Zen's thoughts are suddenly interrupted by a knock on the door. It's opened a moment later by the hospital's therapist, his curly hair disheveled. The man smiles at Zen lightly.

"Well, Mister Hyun, you have now officially been discharged," he says lightly. Closing the door, he walks over to the bed, hands in pockets. "I'm really proud of the strong recovery you've been making."

Zen nods, smiling politely. "Yes, sir. Thank you for all the help."

The doctor looks at him from his higher perspective, his fawn brown eyes sad. "Hyun... I just want you to know that you're not alone in this world." He pauses. "You have friends - practically family - and your leaving them would have them devastated. You may feel lonely, but you can always give me a call; or any one of your friends. They'll listen, because they care.

"And while it may seem that they won't because to them the truth is unbearable, they will anyways. When you get so close to losing one you love, you feel as though everything is falling apart around you. It crushes you, and it makes you wonder if you could have changed something. It's a hurt that no one wants to repeat.

"And I understand that sometimes it's difficult to live for yourself and take care of yourself for you. So instead, live for them. Thrive for them, and thrive for the happy memories they give you. Survive, if only for the sole reason of keeping your lover smiling; heal, if only so that you can carry them with all the strength in your legs; grow strong, if only so that you can learn how to smile; and most importantly, be happy. Smile. Laugh. Giggle, and snicker, just so that you can be okay, and show that you can be strong, that you can be you, and that you are special. Be powerful; be happy."

The man looks at Zen, his eyes filled with passion, with strength and belief. He felt as though with his strength, he could help anyone. "For if you are strong, you can hold up the weak. You don't have to dispel the sadness, nor the anger or hate. In reality, all you have to do is keep them at a distance. Push them away with all of your joy, excitement and love. We're human; we're not invincible."

The man looks back at Zen again, a small smile gracing his handsome features. "And it's okay to be human."

|~|~|~|

Worried. That's how Jumin felt as he stood outside of the hospital doors. The wind blew his coat open and whipped at his face, stinging his eyes.

He sighs.

He'd waited expectantly for this day, completely prepared to confront Zen. And yet... the mere thought of the other sent shivers up his spine and a tingly feeling in his stomach. He could only imagine it to be fear. Fear for him.

He walks into the hospital just as a smal drizzle begins to fall, completely unknown to him.

"Hello, sir! Who are you here to visit?" The woman behind the counter speaks cheerfully to him, smiling widely.

"Hyun Ryu," Jumin says.

"And what's your relationship with Mr. Ryu?" she questions, continuing to tap away at her keyboard.

Jumin hesitates before answering. "He's my fiancée."

The woman looks up in surprise, her fingers stopping their incessant tapping. She folds her hands in front of her on the desk, smiling up at him as if to cover up her initial shock.

"Well, sir, you can sign in to that clip board right there and write the patient's name. Let me find his room number for you."

Jumin pulls the clipboard towards himself, signing it quickly. He feels his insides fluttering at the thought of being with Hyun, completely unknowing of both that and the reasoning of his claiming of the fiancée title. He dismisses it as worry for Hyun's well-being. Of course, how could he not worry about his friend? And besides... he really doubted the woman would let him to the red eyed male if he weren't some sort of relative.

It's not too long until the nurse speaks again. "And his room number is... 4-13."

Jumin nods, handing her the clipboard. He turns on his heel and walks to the elevator, loosening his tie as he went. He sighs.

Pressing the button for the fourth floor, he waits patiently as others get onto the brightly lit elevator going up, sliding a hand through his dark hair as he went. When the elevator made it to his stop, he walks out with a few mutterings of excuse me and pardon.

As he walks down the hall, Jumin is met with strange looks, undoubtedly because of his well-known face and fancy dress. But being seen was the least of his worries; the only thing on his mind then was Hyun. When he finds the other's room number, the dark haired man stops right before his knuckles rap on the door, dropping his hand. He closes his eyes, inhaling deeply.

This was going to be a new beginning. He was going to make this a beginning worthwhile, start things so Hyun would find that he enjoyed living. Jumin wanted to make it all better for Hyun and he was prepared to sacrifice all that was his to ensure that.

Saying that Jumin was surprised when the door was opened before he knocked would be an understatement. He raises his eyebrows at the smiling man in front of him, eyes flicking over to the room's number.

"Oh hello." The man waves a hand at Jumin, chuckling and sidestepping as if to let him walk in. "Are you a friend of Mr. Ryu's?" 

Jumin nods and walks into the room. Hyun seemed almost shocked at his appearance and opens his mouth to speak before the doctor starts first, speaking directly to Jumin.

"Take good care of him," he says simply. "He's worth it. Show him that."