In My Dark Times: Stockholm Syndrome

Chapter 7

After dinner, Harry and Louis are driving across town and parking before they decide to walk the rain soaked streets. Louis goes on about how he transferred to college in London from Doncaster while Harry's smoking a joint and listening intently.

"... Which, I mean, I wanted to get away and see things," Louis is going on with a sigh, "but... it was like, in the beginning, I was scared to leave mum, too... and my sisters."

"I get it," Harry's saying softly, "I used to feel the same way... but... I don't now. I sometimes wish that I still did."

Louis bites his lip as he's studying Harry next to him, his hands buried in his hoodie and his Green Bay Packers beanie on his head.

"I'm sorry, for going on about me," Louis is sighing as he's glancing around the sidewalks.

"What? No, it's ok, Lou," Harry's laughing a little, "I don't mind. I don't."

Louis stays quiet for a moment before he's clearing his throat and saying gently, "you look like you have a lot on your mind."

"Do I?" Harry's asking with a small laugh. "Uh... yeah, guess I can't really hide it very well from you."

"You're very readable for me," Louis shrugs before he smiles some. "Wanna talk? I'm right here."

Harry's smiling a little and burying his hands further inside his hoodie. "Uh, I... I don't know where to start, Lou."

"Start somewhere. Anywhere," Louis suggests as he's glancing around, "anywhere is better than nowhere."

Harry's sighing out his hit, wondering exactly where he should start this... and how.

Louis says softly, "you were acting different in the shower earlier as well. What's up? Why the sudden mood change? Is he bothering you again?"

"He's not," Harry's shaking his head. "Well, obviously he has texted me, but... no. It's not Darren. It's..."

Harry pauses and Louis watches him for a moment before saying, "it's what?"

"I wanna tell you things about me... but... I can't seem to bring myself to," Harry admits, his cheeks burning.

"Harry," Louis whispers as they're stopping at a cross walk. "You can tell me anything. I won't judge... surely you know that."

Harry bites his lip as he's staring off at the city lights in the distance, "I don't want you to think less of me, Lou. I mean, your mum already thinks more of me than she should..."

"My mum?" Louis asks with a smirk, "what..."

"I heard you two earlier, sorry," Harry's mumbling and grinning some.

"She really likes you," Louis smiles, "like... a fucking lot."

"Yeah, I'd say so," Harry's grinning some, "I... I don't think I'm as great as she thinks though, Lou."

"You are," Louis nods some, his voice soft. "You really are. Yeah, you've gotten in over your head in certain situations, but... you're incredibly smart, Harry. I mean, you have amazing grades in uni while you hold down a fucking modelling job..."

"I make part of my money going out with older men," Harry's blurting out, his eyes meeting Louis'. He sighs before he's looking away. "it's my job... I... I'm sorry to just blurt that out... I had to tell you."

"What do you mean exactly?" Louis is asking quieter.

"They're like... men who are lonely and look for partners... and they pay for that partner's time and services," Harry's shrugging as they continue to walk. "I mean, it's not all sexual. Sometimes, it's just business dinners..."