The Diary of the living puzzle

My opinion's on Love and Crushes

I've had a few crushes throughout my time within school not going to lie.

But... I've never truly understood it...

I'm Homoromantic, so I like girls, my first few years in school age 13-15 were hell.

You see I was brought up in a family were if you mentioned the word "gay" you would get stared at... they would judge you for simply saying the word. 

I became homophobic thanks to them.

It

Was

Hell.

At age 13 I was unaware of my like for girls, I thought it odd that I couldn't gain crushes on boys and seemed to only care about how the girls in my class were. My best friend who I will call Star I looked up to greatly, she was like the sun on a cloudy day... always making me smile.

At age 15 I had been through a few boyfriends yet none seemed to click or make me happy... I thought I was just a terrible person... my friend Star was with a guy who at the time was a complete... uhhh.... yeah. Star broke it off with him and we had an argument over something silly... It was at that time... Star came out as gay.

I was shocked, I was proud of her though! She was my best friend. She accepted me as a friend again and I felt happy.

She got a girlfriend and shes happier than ever. I'm happy for her.

I'm almost 17 now and I finally realize that I had a crush on her.

Ironically enough she used to have a crush on me... but because of my homophobia she was afraid to tell me.

I'm over my homophobia. 

My family aren't.

I have a crush currently on a classmate... not that she'll ever like me...

Problem is I'm kind of stuck at the moment...

Two people have crushes on me... both my friends... both in my class.... both guys.

I don't know what to do. I don't like hurting peoples feelings but it brings me constant anxiety.

Any idea's readers?

~Wisteria