The Hideous

Chapter 6 - Charlotte

Does she have to ask me about my stepdad so much? I don't know how to tell her. I will someday, not yet. I'm not ready and she's not ready to hear it. I know she's annoyed with me but I can't tell her.

Suddenly she gets up from the couch and runs off to her room and shuts the door. I hear a loud sob coming from behind the door. Why was she crying? She didn't have anything to worry about. She was perfect. She had a good childhood. I had to watch my father die right in front of me. She didn't. She was younger when her parents died.

Sometimes she seems like a selfish brat when she talks about her family. She thinks I told her a lot...I haven't. Sometimes I'm surprised that I'm not dead yet. He nearly killed me multiple times. I got weaker every time. I just want to see Gracie again. It just doesn't feel right, like I'm replacing her.

I can still hear her sobbing. I just wondered what I did. So I asked. I knocked on the door and asked, "You okay?" She replied, "Yeah I'm fine." I knew she wasn't. I've heard that sentence come from me multiple times. I didn't know if I should've left her alone or not. But I didn't. I opened the door and stepped inside. She was looking at a picture of a man. He had grayish brown hair and a beard. He looked like a pedo. She had scribbled all over it in sharpie with words like 'manwhore' and 'killer'. What the hell?

"Who's that?" I asked. She threw the picture under the bed and said,"Nobody." I said,"Nobody looks like you hate him a lot." She chuckled a bit. It was nice to hear a laugh. I stood in the doorway. I felt like my mom, don't know why.

I felt like my mom in the doorway of the hospital room where my dad past away. The last face he saw was mine, tears streaking down it, messing up my mascara. I don't know how I still remember it. I was twelve for God's sake. I mean I guess when your dad dies right in front of you, you just don't forget it. If I leave, I'm not going home. I'll let them report me missing. If they care enough to do that.

I shut the door behind me and started off to my room again. I needed sleep, so I slept. My phone started blowing up. My mom was texting me nonstop. I had no motivation to answer. I'm sure she was worried and I regret not replying now. I got an Amber Alert for Lia. I knew her parents cared. I'm not surprised there isn't one for me. Should I call my mom? No, she could trace it. I just needed sleep, so I slowly but surely drifted off into unconsciousness.

I had a dream. I texted my mom and told her I wasn't returning. She said she was coming to get me. Instead of coming herself, she sent my stepdad. I woke up screaming. Lia burst into the room not long after repeating, "Are you okay?" The truth was, no.

I checked the time. It was like 1:00 AM. I couldn't sleep so I made myself some coffee and surfed the world of YouTube until sunrise. I hoped I wouldn't get dreams like that anymore, though I knew that wish was never to be granted.

I finally got up at 7:30. I was told there was a gym so I decided I'd try to work out. Maybe get some strength back. My stepdad never wanted me to gain weight. If I gained strength and worked out, then I could fight back. He didn't want that. I worked out for fun when I was young. It helped me clear my mind.

When I got to the gym, the anxiety melted away when I saw that nobody was to be seen. I was isolated from the rest of the world with the treadmill today. The tiniest gleam of sunlight peaked through the clouds outside the window. I planned to do cardio first. Get it out of the way.

A tear threatened to creep down my cheek, but I blinked it away. It reminded me of my dad. When we would sprawl out on the front lawn and watch the sunrise in the mornings. The pink, blue, orange, and sometimes red blending together creating a beautiful rainbow of warm tones. The subtle shapes of the clouds. Making dinosaurs, kitchen utensils, and pretty much anything you can think of.

I realized how much I longed for him. You never know how much you love somebody until they slip away. The remembrance of my father filled me with joy but sadness quickly replaced it.

As I ran, I heard a shuffling behind me. I was shocked to see that it wasn't Lia. But it was Sam. Her honey blonde hair draped across her shoulders. She pulled it up into a ponytail. "Hey, you alright?" She asked with a bit of a southern accent. Though it was faint. "Yeah," I fibbed. "You sure?" She started on the treadmill next to mine. I nodded and started mine as well. The gleam of sunlight that was once there had turned into a bright ray of day.

Were my eyes puffy? Did I have something on my face? Worst of all, were my scars showing? Oh no. I looked over at my arm. The bruise was fading. I haven't felt pain in so long. I'm so glad I left. "If you say so. Anyways, today is initiation. Don't worry, we don't go too hard on the girls. You just have to hold a plank," Sam says. "What do you do with the guys?" I ask. "Oh trust me, you do not want to know." It will haunt me forever if I don't figure it out. I give her a 'girl you best tell me' look. She rolls her eyes and says, "They shoot them in the abdomen. If they don't survive then...well you know."

Still, I can't hold a plank for very long. But I can never return to hell. Never again. I've been through hell. I don't want to go back again. My stepfather made me sleep in a dumpster all because I didn't put a dish away. Lia thinks she has it bad. Though, she has no idea.

Now I feel pressured to tell her, since I may go back. I won't get a chance to see her again. Although, I don't want to ruin her experience and get too close to her. I don't want either of us to miss the other.

I'm just going to do it.