I watched to the side as Ariana nervously played with her hair as she answered some awkward ass questions about us. She was in a middle of an interview because of course everyone wants to know everything there is to know about us and our relationship. I knew how she got during interviews, and how much she hated them. She started to bite on her lip and stuttered on a few words, I noticed her looking for my gaze a few times for reassurance. There were some nice questions and comments made and some that were out of line. But she remained classy as always and answered with grace, she had a lot more willpower than I did. I probably would've cussed them out.
"You did great, love." I went over to her after the cameras had stopped rolling.
"Let's just get out of here, please." I nodded knowing she was overwhelmed and needed to get out and breathe. We had a week long break from tour so we were now back in New York. We were met with a bunch of paparazzi when we got out of the building and I was still getting used to it. We've been public for about three weeks now and the paparazzi was definitely the worst part about it.
"They're fucking insane." she shook her head at the men outside the car after the driver had closed the door and started to drive. We pulled up to a studio a few minutes later because Ariana had wanted me to meet some of her friends.
"So you already know Victoria and Tayla but this is Tommy, Mikey, and Scootie." She pointed to each man as she said their names and I greeted them all.
"So Ari says you're into music production?" Tommy asked with a small smirk on his face.
"Yeah actually I'm in school for it right now." He looked up and chuckled as I said that.
"Fuck school. They won't be able to teach you shit, music production is all being present, hands on, in the studio. No books and pens will teach you anything other than the history of the guitar from like 1910." I chuckled agreeing with what he said.
"I've tried applying for different internships at studios and stuff to put my feet in the water but I never got any luck with that and I had to find someway to pay the bills."
"Well let's see what you can do "Miss Guitar God." he pushed a chair out next to him and I hesitantly sat down and looked around all the high tech equipment around me, I was used to the shitty mixing boards from school but this was the real deal. I couldn't help my hands from gliding down all the buttons as I soaked it in.
"So we're currently working on a song for Tayla but I'm having trouble with coming up something new, I wanna see what you can add to this."
He pressed play and it was a good 15 seconds of a low trap beat that was pretty good but was lacking a bit of energy. He showed me how all the buttons worked and what did what and I pretty much got it from there, I put the headphones on and started mixing and crafting. I was so lost and into my element I hadn't realized Ariana trying to get my attention.
"Hey DJ Mia, the girls and I are gonna get some food, wanna come?"
I took off one headphone and shook my head, she smiled knowing I was so focused on what I was doing and kissed me as she walked out.
After sometime I finally finished and I took the headphones off, going back to reality and taking in what was going on around me. The guys were talking about the football game that was playing on the tv and the girls were working on lyrics.
"Oh is the mix master done?" Tommy asked causing everyone to turn their attention towards me.
"Umm I think so. This is the first time I've done anything like this with professional equipment so take it easy on me." They laughed and gathered around the soundboard. Tommy hit play and the sound of the beat flooded out of the speakers. They all were bopping their heads, dancing, and Tommy had to pause it a few times to keep complimenting it, after the track ended Ariana jumped onto my lap.
"Baby, what the fuck?! How, what, when, where?!" I giggled at her reaction and kissed her temple.
"Damn Mia, looks like you're gonna give Tommy a run for his money." Victoria laughed and I smiled at the reactions from them, it truly meant a lot. A few hours later it was nearing 3 am and the lyrics were done and Tayla finished recording and the song was finished. We all high fived each other and walked out of the studio and that's when I realized my phone kept going off, I took it out and saw that Ariana had posted a picture of me working on the song and captioned it. "my musical genius 🖤" I nudged her on her side after reading it.
After collapsing on our bed as it was nearing 4:30 am now, Ariana propped herself up on her forearms and faced me.
"You fucking killed it in there, you know?"
"Oh it was nothing."
"No I'm serious babe, like that was some dope ass professional ass shit. You know maybe I can call some people and get you in as in intern or something at the studio."
"I appreciate it but I don't want to work my way up from favors from you."
She looked a bit taken back by this but it was true, no one would take me seriously or professionally, I'd just be known as the girl who leeched off her girlfriends career and I couldn't do that to her or myself.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"
"It means that I don't want people to think I'm leeching off of you or your connections since you're well, you."
"Since when do you care about what people think? This could be something amazing for you and you're worried about opinions because I'm your girlfriend?"
"Ugh, no it's not like that and you know it. I just don't want you to think that because we're dating I expect you to hand me everything or whatever. I want to be able to do stuff on my own, it's just how I have always been, I grew up alone so I've always done things on my own."
"Well if you wouldn't be so stubborn and take the opportunity from me you'd be able to open up more and not be so independent."
She was getting angry now, her eyebrows were furrowed her and her eyes lost the soft glow to them. I couldn't believe we were actually having our first real fight.
"Well then I'm sorry that I'm so stubborn and independent?? I really don't know what you want me to say?"
"Listen, of course I know your pain from your childhood and how much that has affected you and how bottled up and guarded it has made you but I don't understand why you can't put your walls down for a second and push your pride away to let me help you have what you want."
Now I was starting to get heated and I couldn't help myself from raising my voice.
"Push my pride away?? Are you being serious? Ariana you don't get it. Life isn't some fairytale and you can decide for me that I will have a career tomorrow or something. I appreciate the offer and it means everything that you care enough to try to help me but I just can't accept it, I'm sorry but that's just not how I am."
"ALL I'M TRYING TO DO IS HELP YOU, DAMMIT! LET ME IN FOR ONCE AND LET ME HELP YOU." She threw the tv remote in frustration and I flinched at the sound of the bang and the batteries soon falling out and rolling on the floor.
"I don't need your help." I lowered my town back down in efforts to calm the situation but instead she grabbed her phone and walked out of the bedroom.
"Where are you going?" I followed her out but she stayed quiet and walked into one of the guest rooms and slammed the door on my face.
