My mafia man

Chapter 16

  "Good morning" James whispered as I opened my eyes, I see his face, he looks so carefree, so happy, his face was plastered with a huge grin "morning I murmured rubbing my eyes, James stroked my hair and left a peck on my forehead "I love you" he whispered looking deep into my eyes, "is this how you wake me up every morning?" I asked him which made him chuckle, "No, we did something else" he replied, "like what?" I asked him innocently which amused him as he widened his eyes with big smile "what do you think we did?" he asked cheekily, "you tell me, man with full memory" I said playfully slapping his shoulder, "those are the things I want you to remember Rose, I don't want to sound like a dick head but I am craving for you" he whispered in his deep hoarse voice, "I would love to but my asshole boyfriend is sending me somewhere I haven't even heard about before" I blurted out and headed to the bathroom.

I hear some mumbling noise as I take shower, it's probably Liam then I heard another noise, it's a women voice, I wonder who it might be, maybe his mum? I rinse off the soap as soon as I can and stepped in the room to find this beautiful silver dress and on the floor were a matching silver sandal, although I don't wear matching stuff I couldn't complain looking at the dress, "did your mum brought it for me?" I asked James which confused him and maybe he understood it after a while so he mumbled "no, someone else did, my mum passed away when I was little" he replied putting his head down, staring at the floor, and i hated this sight, I hated myself for not being able to remember anything and for most I hated that I wasn't able to control my mouth, "I am sorry" I mumbled and tilted his chin up towards me, he looked broken, probably seeing me this way, spending time with a person who doesn't remember anything might have make him this way, I left a peck on his forehead and pulled his face towards my stomach, he wrapped his hand around me as I ran my hand through his hair, "you know you can leave me if you want" I said softly and I find my voice cracking, I don't know for how long I have dated James, I don't know how much I have loved this man and I don't even remember the first time we made love, the first time I let a man touch me, "why do you say that?" he asked looking at me but not removing his hand, he pulled me down and placed me on his thigh, he kissed in each spot where the tears has left a trail behind, "you know if your memory comes back you will hate it that you even mentioned about us separating" he mumbled and fixed my hair, reading my face, "do you know how much I loved you?" I asked him and he scoffed "you loved me enough to stay with me even when I am danger to you, you loved me enough to take a bullet for me, you loved me so much that before the accident happen, when you thought you were going to die, your last called was to me, you loved me this much that when you thought it was your last moment you spent it pleading to me to tell you how much I love you" he replied, his eyes were wet and I could feel mine as well, I wanted to know everything that had happened between us, I wanted my memory back not because I wanted to know how I was but because I wanted to know this man, I wanted to feel my love for him as he had described it, I may have been crazily in love with him to take a bullet, I may have fall in head over heels for him as I chose to stay with him, "will you do me a favour?" I asked him and he responded by nodding his head "can you take me to the place where we made love for the first time?" I asked him and I find his eyes widened, not because he was excited but because he was scared "why are you scared?" I asked him cupping his face, he buried his face on my neck and replied "I am sorry for not telling you earlier, it was because I was afraid that you will leave me", I didn't know what to think, I turned my body around to wrap my legs on his waist "tell me now then James, I hope it's not too late" I murmured trying to calm him down, "few months ago, before you met me you won a lottery, with that money you applied for college and bought yourself an apartment" he replied and my mind was relieved, I thought maybe something happened between us and he is keeping me here against my will, I thought may be he did something worst, unimaginable, "that's it, I won a lottery and I got an apartment?" I asked him with a weak smile, "yes" he whispered pulling me closer to him "so that's where we made love for the first time?" I asked him which he nodded by responding "take me there then" I begged him, "baby, its not safe" he replied, I pulled myself away from him and walked in the other corner of the room, "you know how frustrating it is to not have any memory, how frustrating it is to know I have been happy all this time but all I remember is a dark past, you say you love me, you say I loved you but I feel nothing and you know how angry it makes me? you know me better, so better, better than I know myself and I want to know you the same way James, I want to know you, your past, us" I yelled, James didn't even moved from his spot as he put his head down, I approached him and kneeled in-front of him to match his eye level, I placed my each hand on his each knees and begged "please James, let me remember something, something about you, so that when I am half across the world I can think about us, help me to remember us, help me to crazily fall in love with you again so that I can miss you like the way you will miss me here" I whispered with a cracked voice, I feel my face so hot and flustered, but seeing James just staying here not responding made me more sad "you said you would do anything if I move in here with you then can you please take me back to my apartment so that I can remember at least something?" I asked him which surprised him "you remember that?" he asked with an excitement "no" I replied and showed him the video, "I want to remember every moment of us without this picture and without this video, please James I am begging you" I begged him for the last time, I nearly gave up just then I heard him "let's go then".

James drove me in a black wrangler and explained that it was a thing between us, I wonder what part this wrangler has played in our relation, "here we are" James said breaking me away from my thought, I watched the building and I see no vision, I remember nothing which disappointed me, James pulled me to the keypad and asked me if I remember the code, I placed my hand over the keypad but I remember nothing so James held my index finger and pressed the pin for me; we walked into the apartment and I see this beautiful apartment which wall had visible bricks, the room was clean and my mind sent me a vision, I see a man showing me a thumbs up sign with big smile approaching me, and in the back of my head I visualise a big window so I turned around and let my visual sign take over me, it took me to a bedroom which had this big window and I stared at it, the man I visualised is tapping on the wall and I feel myself loosing "baby, you ok?" James whispered holding me "yes" I murmured and looked around "there was a man here" I said to James, James looked around the room and mumbled "its probably your memory coming back", "do you know who it might be?" I asked James, "the only man I can think of is Chris" he replied, "Chris" I repeated the name, the name sounds so close to me and I tried to match his name with the man I visualise with "Chris" I whispered again, "can we meet him?" I asked James and he instantly nodded, he grabbed the phone from my back pocket and searched for Chris's number.

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"Rose" a middle age man called my name out as James opened the door, before he could say anything James grabbed his elbow and took him to the kitchen, I can see them from the couch I am sitting on and my brain showed me another vision, a vision of James cooking something, I looked at the couch and noticed a yellow lace dress tied up in a feet of couch, I touched it and I see the vision of my hand being tied up, I can't see who exactly tied me up as my eyes are dark, "baby, I cant see anything" I hear my voice, by the sound of it, it didn't sound like I was in pain or anything, it felt like as if it was a good time just then the middle aged man and James walked into the living room, "Rose, remember me? I am Chris?" he said and sat across me, "Chris" I whispered and this is the same man I saw in my vision, "have you been here before with me?" I asked him, "yes Rose, the day you bought this house, we came in together for inspection" he replied and it did make sense, the way he was tapping the wall and showing me thumbs up "I am sorry but how did I know you?" I asked him with a blank face, "I was your landlord Rose, you used to rent one of my house until you had enough money to buy this place" he said looking around the apartment, he is probably talking about the lottery money James mentioned before, "how long did I stayed with you for?" I asked him again which made him chuckle, "well technically you didn't stayed with us, you just rented one of my house and yes you lived there for roughly 1.5 years" he said trying his best to fill me up with all the information he knew about me, we stayed there for a while as James went to the kitchen to grab some water for Chris, "Rose, I am sorry for your memory loss but always remember I will always be there for you like I have been, you just disappeared, you never contacted me and then I heard form the college chancellor that you are living with a Mafia leader, is he the one Rose?, is it because of money?" he asked me with concern, "No Chris, its not because of money, I loved him" I informed him, "loved enough to shoot your own brother and father?" he said in a loud voice but low enough for James to not hear, "what do you mean?" I asked him panicking, "Rose, I heard that you shot your brother and your father the same night I sent them over to you and I also learnt that you did in self defence and your so called Mafia boyfriend and his right hand reported as your witness" he filled me in with all this new information that my mind went blank, I pressured my brain to absorb all this information and pushed myself to remember it but I felt like as if my head is going to burst any minute, "what the fuck did you tell her?" James growled at Chris as I held my head and eventually I shut down.