4 o'clock (K.th. P.jm)

Hurting deep

"How is he doing?"

Jimin knows Yoongi only wants to see he's okay, and both him and his mother only want what's best for him, but he really isn't in the mood today. And he doubts he will ever be.

His mother's reply comes unheard to him, because his miserable sobs cover it and everything else. His thoughts cloud his surroundings. His pounding heart aches, and he just wants to fall asleep and never wake up again.

See what you did? He wants to tell Taehyung, but he can't, not because he doesn't want to hurt him, but because he's gone. Forever. So he can't tell him anything. And he wants to tell him a million things.

I hate you.

Why did you leave me?

Don't leave me.

I need you.

I love you.

I miss you.

Is there even a sense in what he is thinking about? He was never real to begin with. But his absence feels undeniably real. Nothing else does anymore. He is going crazy, and doesn't want to stop. Maybe he will see Taehyung again if he does, or maybe he'll die. Hell, he doesn't care as long as it means ending this suffering.

His bottle of pills is lying on the table, like a painful reminding of what Taehyung truly was. And he made him promise he wouldn't ever forget to take them. What kind of illness tells you to cure it? Taehyung was an angel, something too beautiful for humans to comprehend. And just like all the beautiful things in our world, people fear, envy and destroy them.

"Jiminie. You know this is not the end, it's just a new and better beginning. So don't cry okay?" Taehyung was now more calm, they were going up and down like a rollercoaster, and both their hearts couldn't take it anymore.

Jimin painfully nodded, a broken sob going past his chapped lips, straight from his broken heart. Taehyung cupped his cheek with a sigh, that ended in a bright smile,one jimin wanted to slap away.

Wanted to kiss away.

"You promised you would not leave me. I promised too. And we're soulmates. We can't be separated. But for now you have to do so many things. I want to see you doing so much Jiminie. I want to see you laugh. Cry. Run. Go to the cinema. Date. Make friends. Fall in love. Perform on stage and in the shower. Get your drawings exposed in an art gallery. Bake a thousand cookies with your mother. Have children. Get old with them and tell them about me. Tell them about us. You have so much to do Jimin. And I don't want you to miss a single bit of it." Taehyung was beaming in front of a crying Jimin, who just wanted to tell him he had thought about it all, with a single name in mind.

And so Taehyung had left, just like that, after a hug meant to mend his soul. Jimin hugs himself, too tired to cry anymore. And gets up. Just because.

Just because, he gets dressed. And just because, he grabs his bottle of pills and goes to the door. His mother and Yoongi are in the kitchen, they can't hear the door close.

His steps are silent, his breath still shallow from all the crying. His heart still hurting, mind still holding onto a past that won't come back. A past he never had.

The park is silent, matching his existence. It's past midnight, the street  is empty. He takes a sit on his favourite bench, and looks up to be greeted by a million stars. He finds no strength to cry, so he laughs. Maybe he's already lost after all.

But unbeknownst to him, someone else is hurting too.

It's been ages without updating, and I have no excuses except my last year before university is hell. So I really apologise if anyone still was interested or read this.

By the way, we're near the end guys💙

Ps: I know this writing style is confusing and apparently messy, but I tried to portray Jimin's state of mind, a confused and desperate, almost insane one, through my words, so it looks chaotic. My apologies.