Healing the Breach

Gotta Prepare Much

It's 11o'clock in the morning. It seemed like I stayed up so late last night thinking of how this day was gonna be. I don't know if I was waiting for this day to come or if I was just too afraid to face it.

Just after I stretched up my arms, my passé phone rang and it was my best friend trying to call me for the tenth time. I know what she's up to. I know that she knew what struggle I'll be confronting today. But of course, I don't need to show her that I was really struggling, that I was really disturbed. I just have to be natural and think like what happened four years ago was over.

"I'm going." I answered in my calmest tone.

It was like I don't have the choice to say no. I know everyone's expecting me to be there for the fact that I've never been out of sight to any class party. I should go. I don't want them to think that I'm still affected and just can't move on from that hapless liaison I had with a guy who left me without giving any explanation at all. Most of them knew how miserable and hurt I was from the day he deserted. But only my bestfriend knew those climactic scenes I starred like drowning myself to booze, recklessly running and crossing the streets hoping to die, and tirelessly blubbering during those hushed gloomy nights. Those were the times that I felt like I was just a waste of space, that I was worthless, unloved and can't be loved. But now, I want them to see me... the new me.

"Reunion's at the resort, same place, remember?" she asked falteringly. "Of course! How could I forget that? Just call me back later. Bye."

Okay, time to get ready. I took a 45-minute shower and almost got thirty minutes of deciding what to wear, plus putting on some light make-up to match my face with my get-up; now that's what I call "preparing". I have to look good, I mean, I need to. I want to show them how different I am today. I want them to feel the new aura I have in me. But honestly, I don't really care much about what they'll think of me, it's what he'll think of me that matters more.

It's almost 12:30 in the afternoon and I'm still heading my way to the resort, roughly thirty minutes more of bus travel before I could get myself there.

Memories came flashing as fast as the vehicle runs. The more the situation became vexed as I saw a teen couple sitting athwart flirting each other as if they were inside a room where nobody sees them. How I wished the minx's momma sees her, join us the ride, pinch her ear, pull her hair and drag her out of the bus leaving that lecherous guy whose visage is not even worth seeing. Now I'm being rude. But anyway, we're in a democratic country so I forgive them for that and let them have the freedom to publicly display their affection.

My phone rang and just as I thought, my ever-ready-to-take-pains-with-me bestfriend was calling me again.

"Where are you now?" she inquired.

"I'm on my way," the very common answer that I could give her. "Is he there?" I added in curiosity.

I could hear my heart beating fast as I waited for her answer. It's like I wanted to hear a 'yes' so I could say 'Good! So then he could see my changes that I'm a lot prettier now, and so I could also smack his face straightforward'; and a 'no' so I could just be normal and enjoy the long-awaited reunion.

"Yah. He's here."