A piece of Memory [Short Story]

A piece of memory

 

Written by: Kpurple08

 

© September 2014

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I am standing here looking over the horizon. It’s almost sunset and I can see how the surroundings started to be dark. I sighed. There is inside me that is missing. I smiled. I longed that feeling of great happiness. I longed that feeling of being loved.

But, that was a long time ago. I was so young back then and it never really occurred to me that I am not capable to love, but then, there was him. He made me feel things I shouldn’t felt. He made me happy when I’m always with him. The funny thing is that, we never really understand each other. We always fight and tease each other. We always argue over little things but on the other hand, I knew I was inlove with him. He taught me so many things in life and he is the reason why I knew how to love.

I sit on the bench. I’m here at Manila Bay, sight-seeing the sea. Oh how I love sea…well as long as it is water. I laughed. He knew that I love water…but he never knew that I love him more than the water. I am a swimmer. I swim a lot when I was younger but with him, I was so drown with his love. He always gives me infinity even on the shortest period of time that we were together. I look at the sky, it’s getting darker. I should go home now.

As I stand, it began to rain hard. Instead of running into the nearest station, I stay still. This rain is a piece of memory. This reminds me of him. The rain is falling hard and I am too way back then. I always told him how I love him but he is always opposing me. “I love you more than you love me.” he said. I smile. I am missing this part of my life. If I were to choose over future and past, I rather go back to the past. He was the one who completed me when I was at my darkest. He never knew that. When I see him online, I always wanted to start the conversation first but I was such a coward. I always thought that I might disturb him or that he’s busy doing something. I always thought that I might be annoying him. He never knew all of these. But beside of these things, he never really knew what I always felt when he was so close with me. I constantly missed him and I was always on the verge of screaming how I love him.

Well, all of these happened a long time ago…

And until now.

Yes. I still love him even we were miles apart, even our hearts drifted away and even if I don’t have any chances of meeting him again. He was afraid of me loving another guy when we get into college, but he never knew that I was more afraid that he might find another girl to give him the great happiness that he might not found in me. I knew back then that I was not that type of sweet girl he could have. I am bitter, he knew that. I am so afraid that he would leave me and was so afraid of losing him. He never knew all these things, and I don’t want him to know this. It’s just me loving him all these years.

The rain stopped and I am soaking. I might get sick but I don’t care. All these memories, it always breaks my heart when I remember him. He was my very first love but I think he will never be my last. Not ever. I don’t believe in destiny…well, I might believe in it if it happens to me. But there is no such thing.

I walked away from the bay. People are looking at me as if disgusted because I was soaking. I sighed. People really do love to stares. I called a taxi and ride on it. I told him my address. As I am staring at the window, I saw an international airplane. As I can see, it was about to land at the airport. Well, who cares?

Oh by the way, before I forget, I am Jane. A Certified Public Accountant. Well, way back then, I really don’t want to be an accountant. I just wanted to be an Engineer but it occurred to me that it might be not for me. So I chose to be an accountant. Well, that’s a little background of me from the past.

The cab stopped and I pay the bill. I went out of it and enter the condo. Yes, I am staying in a condo unit alone. I laughed. 10 years ago, I was so afraid to be alone that I still slept on my parent’s room until I graduated high school. Oh, he knew also this one. He always tells me how childish I am and I’ll just laugh at him. He even asked me a situational question, what if we get married and his duty is at night, what will I do? And then I told him, I should have a pet dog or else I might not sleep and wait for him. He just stares at me then shakes his head. Well, that’s how childish I am.

When I get into my condo unit, I took a shower, put on my pajama and shirt and crawl onto my bed. I am so tired that I just want to fell asleep as quick as I can. I check the time. It’s 7:30 pm. I turn on my laptop and logged in to my facebook account. Well, facebook did really well. It’s still up until now. I look at my chatbox and saw a lot of names that I used to be with ten years ago. But I don’t even see his name. Not anymore.

Way back then, at this hour, we are always chatting and talking about some random things. Argue with each other and then lose the argument. Start new topic again and argue again. It’s like our routine. I check again the time, it’s already 9pm. By this time, way back then, we will say our Good Nights, tell how we miss each other and how much we love each other. It’s always there. We we’re so busy being happy that sometimes we didn’t even bother that time will come and we will be separated.

He was not my boyfriend, and I am not his girlfriend.

We’re just friends…with mutual feelings.

And that how we called it.  Mutual Understanding.

I slept and when I woke up, it’s already 8am. It's Sunday morning, and the sunlight streaks over my window. I have no duty today. It’s my day-off. I am not going anywhere. My parents are in the province living their happy life in there. My sister is at Cebu. She’s a very successful architect right now.

I fixed my bed. Walked into the kitchen and prepare a breakfast for me. I was about to eat but the door bell rings.

I am not expecting any visitors especially it’s Sunday and I just want to relax right now.

I walked towards the door, absent-mindedly opened it and…

“Hello there, lady. Long time no see. I brought you pizza and I was about to start my promises I left for you. The ten years of waiting is over. Are you ready to marry me?”

He came back. He finally came back! I was so stunned that my initial reaction was just to cry and punch him on the chest. And he hugged me and all my longed feelings are finally back again.

I am complete again.

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 Author’s Note:  This is me having an emotional setting of the future. Hahahaha. I just gave my story a happy ending because I really don’t know what am I going to write if it’s tragic. Well, that’s it!