Beauty is Imperfection || YOONGI

30 Birthday Pt.1

Did I mention it's also my birthday today?😅 hahaha 💕 what a coincidence the chapter number is also the 30th 😂

•••
•Yoongi's POV•
~March 9th~

Today's my birthday but... it doesn't feel like it.

The guys are coming over to hangout, but before they come over I like to write down my thoughts in my notebook. Its therapeutic to me I guess.

I write mostly everything I feel in this notebook and I've never told anyone about it. All my secrets and feelings are written throughout it. I can never let anyone read them because my words are too dark and too personal.
I've been writing a few of my thoughts recently and I made 3 poems that are very personal to me.

Promises

You have to keep something you promise right?
Then why didn't you?
Why didn't you stay like you promised?
Why didn't you love me forever like you promised?
Why didn't you care for me like you promised?
Oh I know why.
Because promises are just sayings.
Just wishes that we can never have.
Because promises are just lies that people tell.
Just so you can feel special.
Just so they can get through your thick walls of feelings and control your heart.
Promises...
Is a disgusting word people use loosely.
Is a word that is fake and all lies.
Promises...

Trust

Trusted.*
Yes I trusted you.
I trusted you with all my secrets, yet you told everyone.
Trusted.
I trusted you with my heart, yet you dropped it like it was trash.
Trusted.
I put down my walls I've kept up for centuries, yet you played on them like it was a playground.
Trusted.
I gave my all to you and you threw me away like nothing.
I gave you my whole being and you gave me shit.
I trusted you with my whole heart, mind, and soul, yet you want to act like we didn't have anything?
Trusted.
To all of the people I trusted, fuck you for making me the dark, sensitive, and scared person I am today.
For making me feel so scared to trust and tell another human being what's going on inside my head.
Fuck you for making me think and believe that I will never trust another person again.
By watching me break piece by piece right in front of your eyes.
...Trusted.

Love

Being in love with someone.
Having both partners love each other.
Having both partners care and treat each other like their one of a kind.
How does that feel?
Because all I know is one sided love stories.
Love stories that end up with one person being successful and the other being depressed.
Love.
You told me you loved me.
So why does it feel like you hate me?
You told me you'd be there for me through thick and thin.
Why does it feel like your just there when I'm thin?
I love you.
I meant it but you didn't.
Those words haunt me wherever I go now.
Thanks to you.

(A/N:These are actually poems I've written so if you wanna use them give me credit for them 😊 thx)

It honestly wasn't hard to write them. They flew out of me like I was born to write them. I kept that flow going until-

Ding dong.

I got up from my chair and hid my notebook under my folders that were on my desk. I went downstairs and opened the door to the 6 idiots I call friends.