fifteen

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dear tae tae,

its our one year wedding anniversary today, do you still remember? i hope you do. i just hope your conscious.

today was supposed to make me feel happy, yet i feel hopeless. the memories are engulfing me, swallowing me whole. i just wish you were here.

sometimes i wish you weren't an astronaut. i wish you just worked a normal job. but then again, it's your dream. and you were so happy when you became an actual astronaut.

i was happy for you, but of course i was worried. what if something happened? well it did happen.
i'm devastated.

i miss your jokes.
i miss your voice.
i miss your warmth.
i miss your hugs.
i miss your kisses.
i miss everything about you.
but most of all.
i miss your presence.

please, please be alive.
please be well.
i still can't stop crying myself to sleep.
people think i'm depressed.
i probably am?
but at least my patients are still treated in the best condition.
taehyung. kim taehyung.
where are you?
i miss you.

- your husband that misses you so bad, jungkook
1 december 2020

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