The Beginning, I Guess

10. I'm Giving Up On You

I decided that I should get away from Noah for a while, I can't be that much attached to him. I stopped texting him and meeting him. And he and Rose didn't make up either. I went to my job as normal. I went to my desk and there I found the unexpected. I saw beautiful red roses on my desk. I went there hurriedly to know who have sent them.

I can't believe that Noah would do such thing for me; well it is so much for me I guess.

But then I came to realization and I found that was from Luke which has also shocked me. He wrote:
(Dear Kayla,
I know that I always hurt you but I want to compensate what I did to you. Can we meet up?
                                                                                                                                                                                 Luke)

Well at first I was really scared, what if he was doing that like before. Like he just wants to hurt me. But I decided to take the risk, like I will lose nothing if I tried and it would be nice to get away from my thoughts of Noah.

While being at work, Luke has called me on the telephone of the company and he said, "did you receive it?" I said, "do you mean the flowers?" And I was talking , rose was passing by and heard me talking on the phone. Luke replied, "oh yes so what is your answer?"

Actually I was going to turn him down but when I saw how caring his voice was. I decided that I will accept his offer. 

I said, "i forgave you but i hope you will keep your words and wont hurt me again." he said, "perfect, you will really see how i have changed. meet you after work." i said, "well, there is no need to compensate." he said, "well, of course there is. please.. this is the least i can do to you. "

 i had no way to refuse so i just said, "ok."  at the end of the day i kept waiting at the entrance of the company. then liam came running from out of the elevator to me. and he said, "well i am deeply sorry for being late, but i just had a pile of work." i said, "well it is ok, you could have just can canceled it. " he just point to his arm, so that I could hold on him. So I gladly hold on to him. Rose saw us but she just couldn't do a thing. I got on his car and while he was driving I got a text from Noah.

Noah😇: where are you?

I am waiting outside the company.

Me: I left.

Get rose home.

Noah😇: but I wanted to walk you home.

I just didn't reply, because he is really making my job even difficult. Well go to rose why do you even care about me.

But he didn't stop, he kept texting me and I guess when he knew that I won't reply him. He decided to call me, but I just left him. And while I was being busy with my mobile. An opposing car came so far in our direction and Liam couldn't do go away from that car. It was as if that guy wanted to commit suicide and we were the tool for that. And suddenly he crashed into us and the windshield was completely broken and all its pieces fall on both me and Liam.

I just saw Noah and rose sitting on the swings of mine and Noah's meeting place. And they were smiling with each other like we were. And they had their hands tangled together. I went to him running and said, "Noah, I like you. I know you better than her. I can't bear you to be with her. I am selfish and I want you to be just with me. Don't smile to her like you smile to me. You are just all mine." He just pushed me away and he said, "what are you saying Kayla? Are you even hearing yourself? You can never be like rose. You are born like this Kayla, to be always below rose. Just accept the fact and don't just make a place for yourself." I said, "But you were always mine... I was ready to give everything up but not you... I just want you to be the only thing mine."

I woke up in a hospital bed and all my family is beside my bed. But I felt a hand holding mine and it was Noah. I just slipped my hand from his grip and turned my face away from him. All my family was surprised from my action towards Noah.

But I am just tired and I don't really want to see his face in front of me. I want him and rose to be away from my sight for a while.

My mother quickly rushes to me, and she said worriedly, "what happened darling, are you ok?" I said, "I am fine mom, I just want to take some rest." Noah said, "What has happened my little babe..." and I just quickly look at him to stop what he is going to say. And I think he realized that he can't say that in front of everyone. But I guess no one noticed that expect me and him.

Then my mother said, "of course now, you are so tired. So we will leave you to rest for a while. And we will go see about if you can go out today." All of them went outside the room except Noah. He kept staring at me. Then rose opened the door again, took his hand and took him outside.

I actually couldn't understand a thing, what happened? And how did he know that I had an accident? The logical analysis to this is that he was together with rose. Does being together with rose mean that have reconciled? All those thoughts kept wandering in my brain.

Finally I decided to do by their advice and take a rest. And I took a nap for a while until they returned and told me that we could leave now. So I dressed up and went outside.

Actually I wasn't badly injured I just had small cuts from the broken window and my right hand was a little bruised.

Then I remembered that Liam was with me in the car so I asked, "so how is Liam?" my father answered. "Well he is in a coma, and rose is taking care of him now."

I was shocked to hear that rose is going to take care of Liam and when I turned to look at Noah. He is completely fine; I don't think he was even bothered that rose is taking care of another man than him. In the contrary he seemed worried about me; his eyes were full of care and fear like he felt he was going to lose me.

He stretched his hand for me to hold on. But I ignored his action and I said, "Actually I didn't hit my leg, my hand was just bruised. I can still walk." We all got together in the car and I and he were sitting on the back seats. He kept staring at me.

He was really weird.

Then we arrived home. I headed directly to my room and he kept following me, I decided to ignore him but when I was right in front of my room, I turned around and said, "so why are you following me?" he simply said, "cause I'm here to take care of you." I said, "and why would you take care of me?" he said sadly, "why are you treating me bad? I don't know what I have done to you. I just want to help and take care of you, because you were just in a car accident. And I was seriously worried, I thought I was going to lose you." I said, "But I am fine and you don't need to worry any more, and you are not going to lose me or anything. I can take care of myself well. I just need to have some rest. And actually there is nothing for you to do." He said angrily, "stop that Kayla. Like seriously why are you doing like that? You have like this for a while. You are ignoring me. You stopped talking me and we stopped hanging out together anymore."

I actually couldn't answer. Like what would I seriously say? I can't say I love you and I can't bear to talk to you and hang out with you and still know that you can't ever be mine.

I said, "Well I am tired now so I really can't talk about this stuff now. What's important to me is that you and rose be together." He said straightforwardly, "No. me and rose will not be together."

Actually I felt I slightly smile cross my face which I try to avoid.

I said, "Why?" he said, "well I won't talk about this matter until you have rest and can talk. Cause it is a really long story."

I was really curious about what's the reason, but at the same time, I don't have the courage to ask him. Because I am treating he really bad and I can't just show him that I am concerned now about them, it will be completely obvious.

But actually his face was just filled with angry, I felt that he will just hit with anything. So I quickly entered the room and closed the door behind me.

Actually the only thoughts that I had in my mind, that probably rose broke up with him and told him that they can't continue together. Or he may see that it is a dead end.