Forever Halloween(Markiplier X Reader)

Epilogue || Heal

Song: Heal by Tom Odell

You have no idea how great Be More Chill was, holly hell, Michael Mell will always be my favorite fictional character no matter what(along with the Weasley twins :)))

⚠️major trigger warning⚠️

Mark's POV(•0•)

A year. 12 months. 52 weeks. 365 days. 8,760 hours. It never ends. Her smile, her eyes, her laugh. I'll never see it again. The blood covering my hands as I held her close. Her blood. Out of all the people I've seen bleed out, I'll will never get over this one.

"Wanted murderer, Y/n L/n, was found dead in a lake house by Lake Mirron along with police officer Dave Sonto. Mr. Blight next door claimed he saw a two people in the house before he called 911 who police suspect to be Mark Fischbach, another wanted murderer working with Ms. L/n."

The news anchor continued to speak but I couldn't handle to listen anymore, shutting off the TV.

At the memory of the story the news was talking about the day after, I leaned my head against the wall behind me. The empty house I had broken into a year ago, to which no one found me in. I've barely left the house and when I did it was only to get something to eat, which wasn't very often.

A year ago today, Y/n L/n, the girl who saved my ass from being arrested, the girl whose life I ruined, the girl who I killed died. The memory of her life leaving her eyes stuck with me everyday, keeping me awake at night. The light disappearing from her (eye color) iris' as more and more blood soaked her and my shirt wrapped around her torso. The curiosity she constantly had long gone from the beautiful eyes I found comfort in.

Not a day went by when I didn't scold myself for how I treated her. Yes, she did get on my nerves, but all she wanted to know was me. All she wanted was to get to know me. Something as simple as that pissed me off so much. I shouldn't have yelled at her, I shouldn't have ignored her, I shouldn't have treated her the way I did. I would give anything to go back and let her know how much I actually cared about her.

I am at fault for her death. If only I hadn't kicked that damn officer. If only that gun was pointed at me. If only Y/n had ran like I told her to. Because of me, Y/n was left, lifeless, on the lake house's living room floor, her blood leaking out of her body and all over he floor for police to find. The image burned into my mind and never once left for a second.

Yelling from the elderly man sounded from the front porch, on the phone with the emergency line again. The lifeless version of Y/n laid in my lap as my tears fell onto her, mixing with the dark, red liquid that still fell from her torso. My body was covered in the sticky substance. I didn't want to leave, but I knew I had to. Dead or not, I couldn't leave Y/n. It felt as if I left, she'd wake up and wonder hopelessly why I left her. Or hate me for killing her.

Hearing the man's voice get louder as he got closer, I placed one last kiss to Y/n's forehead, a tear or two falling onto her face as I do so, gently lay her head onto the floor, and stand up on shaky legs. I take one last look at her still body, her eyes closed peacefully, and quickly make my way out the back door, but not before taking a last look at the scene.

I held my breath as a tear escaped my eye, staring up at the blank ceiling. The gun I've been holding onto since Y/n died tight in my grip, still holding some of Y/n's dry blood on it. I closed my eyes tightly, finally allowing myself to breathe only for a sob to come out. I placed my empty hand over my mouth, my head still supported the wall I leaned against. My eyes opened, vision blurry with tears. Moving my head to stare at the gun in my hand, gravity pulled the salty water from my eyes and onto the gun, next to a dot of Y/n's blood.

I thought my life was getting better. Y/n by my side, a kid in the future, isolated from the world in the middle of the woods and next to a calming lake. How wrong I was. Everything had to be taken away. If I hadn't raised my voice, the man next door wouldn't have heard us and never called the police for "teenagers breaking into my neighbors cabin."

The air blew against me as I ran and ran, my torso without a shirt and her blood still on my hands and chest. I had stopped crying by now, but only until I found somewhere I could stop. I searched, looking everywhere for somewhere to hide at. I couldn't go into town with a gun and blood covering me. Eventually, I found another house I could stay at, hoping no one lived in it. I broke in, but as soon as I did I didn't take a second to fall to the floor to finally let all my frustration and grief out.

Examining the pistol in my hand, I clicked it open to stare at the one bullet left, only one idea how to put it to use. Clicking it closed again, I continued to stare at the small gun gripped tightly in my shaking hand. Another sob escaped my lips as I continued to think about my past with Y/n. The small things I knew about her, the adorable smile I'd get to see when she spoke about her childhood and how much she loved the holiday she died on. All because of me, the one and only Mark Fischbach.
(I still can't tell if I'm spelling his last name right but I'm too lazy to check rn)

I would give anything to hear her voice again, to see her smile again, to see her bright eyes again, to hear one of her many questions again. I would give anything to see her again.

So I'm giving up everything.

Placing the barrel of the pistol between the gap of my top and bottom row of teeth, I squeezed my eyes close tightly, seeing none other than Y/n's lifeless body that haunted me every day I kept breathing.

Without taking another breath, I pulled the trigger my index finger rested on. Blood covered the wall behind me, taking my life from me immediately, my hand and the gun dropping to the floor, finally empty of any bullets.

I gave everything just to see her again.

I'm sorry ;-;

Also, I know this is wAy off topic from this very depressing chapter, but I need advice because I have no friends and I have no idea what to do. I doubt any of you care or will even read this, but it's worth a shot.

Sooo, my dad and his girlfriend(I always called her my step mom because it was a lot easier) broke up after six years of being together. I still have no idea why, but I know that she was really upset and my dad seemed unaffected by this. This was a week ago and my dad has been sneaking someone into the house at night and they leave before I get up for school. He thinks I don't know, but really, I can hear and see someone pulling up in our driveway from my bedroom. A lot is changing without my step mom. We used to go on a fuck ton of trips and that was only because of her, no more dinner at the table...another thing that happened only because of her, we'll get a fuck ton of less money coming in and we'll probably have trouble affording things, and most importantly I won't have a girl to talk to about things that girls go through and when I need more stuff for those things. With all of that changing, he is beginning to hide things like sneaking people in at night and it's giving me a lot of anxiety and I just don't want to be at home anymore(as I write this, that person he sneaks in is here). I want to ask him who it is and tell him I'm not as stupid as he thinks I am but I don't think I should. I don't know what to do and I just wanna move out but I'm only fucking fiftEEEEENNNN.

Please, just assassinate me :')