hit or miss. | vmon.

Chapt. 1 - How I Fell In-Love

 Namjoon's P.O.V.

 I looked through my feed on Tik Tok. I don't know why I've decided to post on here but it's something to do in my free time.

 It's kind of a loser move, even I'll admit, but it's funny to see other people making fun of each other. Of course, I've never admitted that to another living soul though.

 Who knows what'll happen to me if I dare tell anyone in my school, I'll probably never hear the end of it. I might even be bullied if they think it's that dumb, but I do agree with them on that to an extent.

 There's this one account I've been seeing constantly, though. It's just like any other troll account, he duets other people, makes fun of them, whatever. Something is different about him though-- I guess he's kinda cute unlike a lot of people on this dumb app.

 A few of his duets, I'll admit, are kinda cute, but those ones are usually the older ones when I think he was taking this app 'seriously'. The newer ones are just him making fun of people, which I still find a bit cute, but they're mostly just funny.

 I guess it's funny to make fun of people, but that just makes me think if his life is sad, so he makes duets to make himself feel better? Or he just wants to fit in with the new trends? It may just be light-hearted fun, but I've been told multiple times I look into stuff way too much.

 I'm probably just thinking it in the wrong way, maybe his life's just fine and he just does this in his free time like me. Though, I kinda want to get to know he a bit more. He seems interesting and I believe we live sorta close to each other based on some of his past Tik Toks.

 Now though, we're basically complete opposites. I probably should've mentioned this before, but I'm what some people consider to be an e-boy. Unlike most though, I'm not an a-hole.

 Surprising, but really, do e-boys really act like that in real life? Yeah, basically. I've seen far too many Tik Toks of them and I've talked to a few, the majority of them have straight up trash personalities in and out of their Tik Toks. I'm surprised they can tolerate themselves, if I acted half as bad as they usually do, I wouldn't even be able to tolerate myself.

 I consider myself to be polite, even if I would be considered an e-boy. I know proper manners, and won't randomly say inappropriate bs. A lot of them do that, which may be surprising because of their "soft boi owo" aesthetic.

 Personally, I find that aesthetic just really cringy and weird. Well, from what I've seen, heard and read about them, they're basically an f-boy who are 'sensitive' and what not.

 I mean sure, I paint my nails, sure I wear big sweaters, but that's because it's comfortable. I don't try to say, "uwu i need some1 to cuddle" and ruin perfectly fine songs on TikTok.

 Some people make great songs and trends terrible and cringy, and overall just ruins it for everyone. I at least try to make normal Tik Toks and act normal. Well, as normal as it can get when you're an e-boy.

 That doesn't stop other people, mostly other e-boys and e-girls from slipping into my dms asking if I'm "looking for a fun time."

 Though, I remember one of the dms from a certain someone which caught my eye. It was from someone with the user 'Taelienasf'. It was mostly the username that caught my eye, but I looked at a few of his Tik Toks and he was pretty cute, to be honest. Usually, I wouldn't find people attractive or even cute, especially on TikTok, but then something about him made him, special, I guess.

 Maybe it was his eyes? In most of his Tik Toks, they glistened a bright color which I'm sure is why he had so many fans. Or maybe it was because he was just overall perfect-- I mean his-- oh god. I think I have a crush goddamnit.

 Well, this is a first. I've never really felt 'attracted' to anyone before. Sure, I've called people pretty before, but it was either because I was just being nice or it was in a we're-just-friends way. This time, it was it an I-have-a-crush way.

 Thinking about that made me have my own doubts, though. Would he think I was attractive? I don't consider myself to even be average in looks even if other people tend to disagree. How could someone like him, reciprocate my feelings? Thinking of that thought made me remember the first message he sent me.

 I remember it clearly like a tattoo in my mind,

 'Heyo you seem pretty tranquil, wanna be friends or something? ;)'

 It made me laugh for a bit since he was using 'big words', and from screenshots I've seen from other people of messages from him, he doesn't do that regularly. Still, it made me laugh, well, until I got to the winky-face part. That just made me rethink all my life choices and how I got to this point in time.

 The one thing I had to think about was some cute guy was trying to use big words to impress me-- oh yeah-- and he literally sent me a winky face. It may not seem like such a big deal when you're texting with friends, but he had literally never messaged me before. Then I started thinking about him-- surely he'd send a winky face to whoever-- so I wasn't really that special, was I? Many thoughts were coursing through my mind before he sent another message.

 Wait-- I need to reply to him! I can't just leave him hanging, that'd be rude to do to such a perfect human being.

 'Oh, thanks, and sure, let's be friends!'

 Did I come off weird? What if he was just playing around and he didn't actually want to be friends with me? Oh-- he replied already.

 'Nice, the name's Taehyung, or Tae for short. What about you, pretty boy?'

 I'm pretty sure my heart stopped as soon as I got to the end of his message. Many people think 'pretty boy' is an insult, but really it's one of the nicest things you could ever say to someone. So I'm pretty sure my cheeks lit up brighter than my nails I just finished painting.

 I instantly replied back to him,

 'It's Namjoon or Joon for short'

 'Well nice to become friends with ya, Joonie'

 J-Joonie? Hm... I guess it's pretty cute... I smiled a bit as I wrote out my reply.

 'Nice to become friends with you too, TaeTae!'

 He didn't respond after that-- for an hour anyway. I thought I'd done something wrong until around 8 pm, he messaged me again,

 'Sorry I didn't respond! I just needed a min that was rlly cute.'

 And that's basically how I fell in love with Tae.