Love... Not Romance [BoyxBoy]

First - You can't Escape Love

I wasn't supposed to kiss him. But as I breathed air into his mouth to revive him, I suddenly felt this urge to do so. It was an unthinkable, and yet undeniable urge. An urge that was too strong for me to deny.

His lips were just so soft, so luscious, that when I resuscitated him, I tasted the sweetest honey that anyone could ever taste in their entire life. In that moment I was tempted, and I let myself lose to that temptation; very quickly, very easily. And because of that moment's weakness, I've made a mistake; possibly the greatest mistake in my entire life.

I've just finished giving him mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. He coughed out all the water that blocked his throat; he was slowly opening his eyes. I looked down at his face, at his eyes, and then at his lips. He was handsome - exceptionally -, his eyes were blue - like the beautiful sky -, and his lips... his lips were simply irresistible.

So before he regained his full consciousness, I took the chance. I took advantage.

I kissed him.

I kissed him gently.

I kissed him softly.

I kissed him.

I kissed him and then moved back away.

And as he regained his full consciousness, I started running away.

I wasn't supposed to kiss him.

But I did.

I wasn't supposed to fall in love with him.

But I did.

In that moment's weakness, in that very short moment that I had laid my eyes on him, in that quick moment that I took advantage of his condition and stole a kiss, and in that very first moment that I've met him, I've fallen in love with him.

I've fallen in love with a total stranger, a boy, that just few moments ago, I never thought existed.

I've fallen in love with a boy...

A boy like me...

When you fall in love, there are three emotions that you could feel. It's either joy, pain, or both at the same time. For me, the only sensation that I could feel in my chest was inexplicable pain. There was no happiness, no bitter-sweetness, just utter pain.

As I ran barefooted through the woods out of the open road, I could feel my heart pounding. It was fast, it was loud, and it was very painful. I ran through some branches that scratches my skin, stepped on rubbles and twigs that wounded my sole, but I did not feel any pain at all. Every pain, every other sensation in my entire body was overshadowed by the tremendous hurt that my heart was feeling.

I couldn't do anything.

I couldn't think of anything.

The only thing I was capable of, at that moment, was to cry in silence.

Tears were continuously falling from my eyes; tears that came from the overwhelming pain in my chest. I was crying, but I can't let out my voice. I guess deep inside, I was thinking, that if I let my voice out, then the feelings I was trying so hard to fight would pour out, that I wouldn't be able to hide it anymore, not even from myself.

From the very beginning, it was a love that could never be. Maybe that's why I was crying; because, yet again, the universe had thrown me in the middle of dark tunnel without hope of finding a light at the end.

Why was I really crying? Was I crying because I knew how great my mistake was? Was I crying because I knew that the love I suddenly felt was destined to be doomed from the very beginning? Why was I crying? Even I don't know why.