Arey! Cupid.

II

aman raazin
________________

"umma, choodu edukunnu!"

   the air conditioning was turned off, and despite me having been screaming for the past five minutes, my mother hasn't heard a word.

   it is hot.
excruciatingly hot.
  and my mother has decided to start her new form of exercise (sweating and eating only cucumber) just as the summer heat started.

  "umma, please i'm begging you, aah ac onnu on aaku."

   i would switch it on myself, but the controls and remote are in her room which she has unfortunately kept locked.

  i grab the window handle and throw the window open, it doesn't do much, it's just as hot outside, if not hotter.

   i stare out the window and watch people walk by; from the balcony of my room, the people down there look like ants.
  not very tiny, actually.

  "like if ants were being observed through a microphone."

"microscope."

  "what?" i turn around; my sister stands in the doorway, a chesire smile on her lips and an envelope in her hands.

  a brown envelope.

  my eyes go wide and i jump off the bed and grab the envelope from her.

"i can't believe you got accepted into university but you can't even tell the difference between microscope and microphone."

 i stare at her, "you opened my acceptance letter? what part of my do you not understand."

  "oh please, it came yesterday and you weren't home, you came today morning, besides, i couldn't resist so i opened it."

  "curiosity killed the cat."

"aah, but satisfaction brought it back to life. term two semester three. idioms. im a college chick too bro."

  "onnu podi, veriday oronum kondu vannolum"

  she laughs and sits on the carpeted floor, she crosses her legs and looks at me expectantly, she's waiting for me to read it.

  but i don't want to. I'm too nervous. i know i got in.
   leila's already confirmed it, but i won't believe it till i see it and i don't think i wanna see it because that means it's real and i'll have to leave for college and that makes me want to throw up right there on leila's new pants.

  "you better not freaking hurl right now aman."

  i look at the letter and take the paper out from the slit she's already made.

  i smile, i got in. we already knew that. my father's friend was the dean of admission. he had confirmed my admission way back.

   the letter was a mere formality.

  then the warmth washed away, and reality rained down on me.

  i would be leaving.
   i didn't want to leave. i liked the penthouse we lived in, the monotone to my morning, but i knew why my family was pressing for me to start college. thats why i had applied for early admission.

   my semester at new york university started in september.

  "mom and dad are leaving after two months. they bought the house."

   i look at her, the envelope and letter still clutched in my hands. as if, if i loosen my grip they'll vanish along with my sports scholarship and special quota.

   "how bad is the state right now?"

"financially? not so good. come on, mom and dad used to buy hotels like they were cereal, the minute the scandal came out they can't even afford to send you to college anymore. and we're leaving back to kerala."

  back.

  i had never lived there in the first place i wasn't going back, i was going for the first time.

  "you have an entire year left," i sit down next to her and place the paper between us, "you won't leave any time soon... right?"

  she doesn't know. she looks at me and her face tells me she's scared too. my family lived in kerala for two years when leila was born, after that my dad got promoted and was transferred to new york.
   i was three when we shifted and finally settled in new york.

  i had grown up here–my entire life was here. my first steps, my first words, everything, all of it was here in this penthouse in new york, and i wasn't ready to let all of it go and leave to somewhere i had never even seen.

  we had never gone during vacations, or marriages.

leila had gone, once or twice during our cousins weddings, but i had never even left new york to go anywhere except around america.

and going to india seemed so different for me. i didn't want to leave everything behind. i was comfortable here.

   "im graduating this year aman, besides mom and dad have started talking about my marriage. so i'll have to go back, get married... and you know how it goes."

   "what about aditya?"

she gives me a small smile, "that was never going to work out anyway."

∆ ∆ ∆

my father frequently left for business. a lot of the time it was just my mom and me.

  my sister lived with her friends close to the campus, we saw her during holidays and she would visit for stuff like my graduation and basketball games or whenever she was free.

  but she graduates in two months, and after that her, my mom and dad are leaving back to kerala; the only reason i'm not going is because I got admission in college and besides, i don't want to leave new york.

   my dads business trips could vary from one week to two months or even longer if necessary. as of now, my dads at the indian embassy trying to work out his innocence with our family lawyer.

  the lawsuit pending against my dad and the company has been draining our funds down the pipes. i mean just a few months back they spent money like they grew it on their own farm, now they cant even afford to send me to college unless I get a full coverage scholarship.

"aman, you don't need to be scared, its all going to work out fine. i promise."

  i look at her and i want to hope to hell and back that its true, but im now 19 and the only thing im sure of is that promises are false hopes.

  and people almost never keep them.