My Story....

Chapter Seven

It's March of my junior year and you said it was okay for me to have a sleepover. I invited some friends over. We were having fun. One of my friends showed up drunk and crying because her girlfriend had just broken up with her. We will just call her She asked to use my phone so she could call her. I said yes. But she didn't call her, she called Quintin. She called him and cried and said she felt like she wanted to die. He was at work and didn't know what to do. So he called the police and they tracked the number to our house. They showed up to get her. And she left your stuff there. She left her alcohol there too.

A few weeks went by and I told her I would bring it to you, along with what you had left there. I split it in between two bottles of SunnyD. I went to school and gave the wrong bottle to the wrong person. She ended up drunk in the office and told who gave it to her. I was called in and then they called you. I was crying. I didn't see a reason to lie so I told them what happened and I was suspended for five days.

We had a meeting with the superintendent that Monday morning and They could tell I felt bad for what happened. Normally an action like this was ground for expulsion, but they decided to just suspend me for the remainder of the school year and I would finish the year online. As I have never really gotten in trouble at school for anything.

A week later and I was to start my online classes. I was set I finished strong, spent a lot of time at the library.

It was finally my senior year. And time for me to go back to school. Everyone missed me, some spun lies saying I got caught selling drugs. I didn't really care what people thought of me because I knew the truth, everyone involved knew the truth. So the things people were saying didn't really matter to me.

It's May and it was all about the seniors. A week dedicated to us and anything we wanted to do. That week was full of pep rallies and pranks. We had senior skip day, but you said I had to go to school. I said no that I had plans with my friends. You left angry and called your friend and told her that I thought skipping school was more important than my education? What? Funny, because senior skip day was a tradition. It was a day where we all just had fun and went to the beach. Me and my friends didn't go to the beach, we went to his house and smoked weed and I ended up losing my virginity. Funny how that played out. It was fun but so weird, I didn't understand why. Until I fell in love with my best friend.

I was in choir, Vox humana. We had a concert and when it was over, all you could talk about was how that guy was cute and I should talk to him. You talked about his hair and how nice it was. Marie kew me and him dated. I dated him the summer before my senior year, It was nice I guess. But I knew I didn't feel that way towards him or any guy really. We got back and you just wouldn't let it go. So after pacing back and forth for forty-five minutes, I finally went in your room and asked if we could talk. You didn't look at me. Before or after what I told you. I told you that I didn't look at him the way you wanted me to. I didn't look at guys the way you wanted me to. I told you that the way you felt about guys, was how I felt about girls. You said "so what you're gay?" I didn't look at you. I just nodded my head. You said that I had been lying to you for years and you would never trust me again. I went into my room and cried.

I didn't like being upstairs, I didn't like sleeping in the room across from you. So I asked if I could go back to my room. You said no. I said okay and just went back to your room. I call it your room, because it was never mine. That was never my home. A home is supposed to be a safe place, where you feel loved and cared for. Where you actually want to be. The people in it actually spend time with you. Yes I get that no home is perfect, but this, this was just broken.

She went in your room and said I was on my phone. I wasn't even on it, I was going to sleep. But somehow you always believe everything they said about me instead of what I said about me. We got into an argument over my phone. Because I didn't want to give it to you. I wouldn't give it to you. I sat at the kitchen table crying and I texted a few friends. Marie told me you told me to leave, I heard you say it so I KNEW it wasn't a lie.I snuck out and my friend came to get me. You kept texting me, telling me to bring me your phone. I didn't. I didn't want to go back to your house. I wouldn't. The next day we had school, I went and they called me to the office. Apparently you decided to call the police and say I ran away. You failed to mention you said to leave? Did that thought cross your mind? Maybe tell the truth for once. I guess it didn't. You showed up to get me and I told them I didn't feel comfortable or safe there.

Of course they needed a legit reason to not send me back. So I told them. I told them about the time you saw fit to throw her down the stairs and point a gun in a 13 year old girls face. You said that was a lie. That I made it up. That you didn't even have a gun. Did you not mention how you carry your gun everywhere? How you even had it when you came up to the school? I stayed in the office all day, doing classwork and talking with the counselor. I wrote her a note. I said, "I would rather die than go back there." She called Rogers. A place where they send people that think the way I did... I went, the lady said she didn't think I actually wanted to die. That I just wanted someone to care and actually love me. I laughed at that because you never did any of those things. Now here is the part I still laugh at to this day. You came to pick me up. I got in your car and the only thing you said to me was this. "Do you have any idea what this is gonna do to my name? No college will want you after this." I didn't give a fuck about your name or college. What I wanted was for you to listen. What I wanted was for to show some type of sympathy. So listen to me, to my problems... But you never did. We got back to your house and you yelled at me. You yelled at me for lying on your name. You took my hair down. You said "A person this ugly on the inside deserved to look that way on the outside." All I could do was cry. You told me to shut up and you went back upstairs.