Daddy Duolingo

Chapter 1

I ariseth from mine own night's slumber whence a soaked staineth of mine own heart's drops of sorrow did lie. I troteth toward mine own quaint vanity, and thither reviles mine own reflection. I toss mine own luscious gold locks into a coronet dutch braid, and hark to the twitters of the ingraft starling. Mine own emerald green eyes art rimmed with red, and unto mine own thick lashes, I swiftly apply mascara. Immediately before I lift mine own mahogany lipstain from the count'r top, mine own mother throws ope the doth'rs to mine own chamb'r. Moth'r holds one Hennessy bombard in her handeth.

"Arise, Sirrah!" she exclaims. "Thou hath been purchas'd. Lodge thy belongings in a packeth and arrive down the stairs to greeteth thy new own'r."

I stareth at her and dropeth mine own lipstick by mistake; I am ever so clumsy and fartuous. "How couldst thee doth this to me? I am thy daught'r. I doth not comprehend!" Mine own blott'd eyes blur with teardrops.

"I hath did sell thee f'r the sole purpose of the want of wage for the renteth upon this household, as well as the necessity of m're cocaine."

Gouts of woe stream down minr own visage as I gaze upon Mother while she throweths ope a case and fiteths hang'rs of mine own robes into it. She hands to me the bageth and pushes me down the spiral staircase.

I look toward the doorway to the east, thither doth a visage of green stares upon me with bulbous midnight orbs. His longeth yellow ton'd nose and mouth reflecteth the sun yond creeps in through the stainless glass windows. The charming Duolingo night bird stands at the threshold, leaning on the pillar beside him.

"Hither is thy new own'r," mine own abusive moth'r declares.