Dear Alia,

Take me to the Library just once more!

It hurts dude...like that terrible hollow feeling, aka pain!
I can't even!
Whatever this thing is, it's draining me! Everything is!
It's called emotions I guess..
They're all over the place...and people are stomping all over them with their six inches heel (remember, OUR fav reference for sad stuff ؛))..and the sad part being, they're all the people who love me and care for me
I know they do, they just don't realize how some things can affect me OR in this case, are affecting me...
I miss you Al
So much
I told you all this kahani because I'd call you in a heartbeat and do this very same drama, if you were here...IF!
Oh don't even get me started with the ifs
We ll go there another day :)

Tomorrow, or shall I say today?...marks three months since you left me
How did you just go? Without even thinking about me?
I'm silly to be blaming you..Sorry babe
I just keep uttering crap these days!
Anyways, so three months...you probably already know how these months have been for me ...
No one is enough here...no one
Trust me, NOBODY!
You always thought that I loved and chose other things above you, granted, I made you feel like that...(sorry about that)
I have tons of apologies to make btw..
Anyways, soo
I've come to a conclusion. You were someone who couldn't be compared.
My love for you, was, and is, greater than all the things I've come to love in my 17 years combined
You, are you, and that's why I'm as miserable as I am, today!

It pricked me A LOTTTTTTTT when Aysha kept saying that she visited the library with Sabheeha and studied! Nobody in this world will ever know how MUCH that hurt me...except my Rabb!
I couldn't stop my traitorous tears when I recalled all our continuous visits and dates to the very same, extremely private place...I miss it!
I miss annoying you and sneaking food in the library with you! (our sacred 'bird food' stash😂😅) I miss it So much Alia! It killed me to think about how, three months ago, this very same day, we planned to visit the library in the morning to study for Islamic, and Allah had plans to make you visit the hospital and later take you away..,
See
Everyone wants you...everyone always wanted you!
I knew people were jealous of our friendship, because we are that awesome...but dude, you be the cooler one...see, even Allah wanted you😁

I hope you're having a good time up there baby! Don't miss me too much
If Allah wills, he ll grant you my awesome company soon
InshaAllah
Can't wait to meet you bud ❤️

Dated: 13/2/19