Freckled Scars // Lams discontinued

Chapter 8 - Sensitive

John and Alex fucced lol

i'm not sorry.

okay i'll go home now.

—————————————————————
Trigger Warning: Cutting, Depression, Slight Lemon

John's PoV

I curled up on Alexander's lap, his arms wrapped around my waist as we watched TV together. Occasionally I could feel him pressing light kisses on my neck. I kept hearing him whispering 'I'm sorry' in my ear a few times. That's what made me feel bad. I made him feel bad because I'm such a baby. I shook off my feelings, looking at the TV again, in which we were watching Cujo.

"Jackie?" I heard his voice, low and sweet.

I responded with "Hm?"

"Do you forgive me?" I felt his chin on my shoulder.

"I- yeah- i don't know why you're sorry, babe." I smiled, finding it cute how he was just acting like a puppy, because now he's giving me through cute eyes the say 'please forgive me or I will not talk to you'. But I know Alex would still talk to me after this.

My smile gave a better answer than my first.

"So is that a yes?" He asked with hope in his voice.

"Hm- Yes." I giggled, turning my body at a 180, so i was sitting on his lap, my chest facing his. He planted a small kiss on my lips. His lips were so soft. So warm. I couldn't help but kiss back.

I felt his hands snaking around my waist. I allowed him to keep them there as I wrapped my arms around neck. He pulled me closer, I ran my fingers through his thin, brown hair.

I love this. I absolutely do. I love this. I love him. He loves me.

'I love you. I love you. I love you. I lov-..'

My thoughts were cut of when he ran his hands down to my thighs and squeezed them, causing me to yelp, biting my lip. It wasn't all from pleasure. Pain as well. My cuts- My scars-

Alexander pulled away quickly "Baby, are you okay?"

I wiped away forming tears in my eyes "I-I'm fine- I'm okay.." I nodded.

"Jack, you're crying." He wiped a tear from my eye to prove his claim.

I looked down at my legs, "Y-Yeah just- My thighs are sensitive I guess."

Alex cooed sympathetically, "I'm sorryyyyy."

"Stop apologizing. Its fine, Alex. You say sorry too much."

I didn't realize how rude I sounded until Alex mumbled "Sor- I mean-.. just-.. Are you alright?"

I wanted to say no. I wanted to tell him I wasn't okay. But I didn't. "I'm fine.. I didn't mean to yell."

"It's okay, just know you can tell me anything if you need to."

'You need to tell him.'

'No you don't. He'll leave you. He'll think you're so worthless.'

'Tell him!'

'NO!'

"I'm fine, Lexi. I promise." I lied. I lied to him. I lied to Alexander.

"Promise?" He asked, needing reassurance.

"Promise." I reassured.

'STOP LYING!! STOP!'

'You won't bother him. He'll stay with you.'

'Tell him! He'll help you!'

'He'll leave you.'

Alexander's phone alarm went off. "Shit my mom's calling. I gotta go, baby." He picked me up and laid me on the couch, kissing my head. "I love you."

"I love you too." I mumbled, a small smile on my lips.

And with that, he left the house, and I was alone with my thoughts.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Hey guys. Hope you like the slight angst! And the beginning joke lmao. I'll go home now xd
❤️ ~ Anthony