Case of The Confounding Jester (Editing)

Chapter 1

"Excuse me, excuse me."
Dodge left. Dodge right. Straight down the escalator. Swipe the metro smart card.
Yes! Home Run.
Oops, not yet. The train doors are closing. Run faster.

Splat!

Staring at the floor of the train, I lie still for a minute trying to catch my bearings. 

Every part of my body hurts from that hard fall. But, that's okay. I made it. I caught the train on time. Umm, more like tripped into the train.

I get up slowly only to find a fat, old lady glaring at me. Though her face is wrinkled, it stills glows with vitality. She's wearing a white floral dress with wet, brown stains and is clutching an umbrella tightly. 

The old woman continues to glare at me as I take my seat. 

Oh well, she probably got up on the wrong side of the bed. 

I lean my head back and close my eyes hoping to alleviate my pounding headache.

Whack!

My eyes water at the sharp, shooting pain and I clutch my leg, curling inward. The crazy, old lady walloped me with her umbrella. She should be in an asylum and not out in a public. 

I start to take out my badge when I hear her say, "Manner-less git. Spills coffee and doesn't even apologize."

Hang on a second. I was carrying coffee to work this morning. Where's my cup?

Looking around, I notice that the passengers on either side of the old lady are also covered in brown stains. There's a strong coffee aroma drifting through the compartment. A coffee cup was at the end of the compartment, having rolled from the train door, leaving a wet, sticky, brown trail. 

Oh, dear! That cup's probably mine. That would mean that the stains on the passengers are from the coffee that I spilled when I tripped into the train.

Sinking lower into my seat, I apologize profusely. The old woman snorts and looks away. 

Whew! At least I wasn't being whacked any more. 

Despite my rather unfortunate start to the day and my pounding headache, my good mood doesn't diminish. The chief is finally going to assign my partner, Blade and me a new case today. 

Two months ago, Blade and I were assigned to a burglary case. After doing due diligence, we identified the culprit as James Oliver. We got a tip that he was partying with his girlfriend, Carla Zanders in Club Zero and immediately went to arrest him. When Blade was cuffing James, his girlfriend began protesting and grew violent. She was a petite little thing and was wearing a short, backless, black dress held up by a flimsy strap around her neck. I tried to restrain her. 

Drum roll, please. What could be expected of the world's biggest klutz a.k.a. me trying to restrain a girl in a party dress? 

Well, my innate clumsiness led to a huge fiasco. When I tried to restrain Carla Zanders, her dress fell off. In public! 

Not only was the incident embarrassing, but, I ended up messing with one of the most prominent families in New Rocher. The Zanders own chains of restaurants, bars, and hotels throughout the city. They also own several pharmaceutical companies. Between all their businesses, the family employs almost 70% of the city.

Getting into trouble for that incident is an understatement. The department was sued. The chief was very close to bursting a blood vessel. Thankfully, he didn't and saved me from a manslaughter charge. There was an internal affairs review as well. I was reprimanded and placed on probation for only two months luckily. 

Anyway, coming back to the present, my time for reflection is finally over and I get to work on a new case from today.