Stay ➣Romanogers

Chapter 5: Remedy

He takes her to Amendola's, a little Italian eatery tucked into the bottom of a brownstone not far from their apartment building. Of course she hasn't been there, but she gets the impression he hasn't much either, if at all. The place has a nice patio out front, and they sit out there while they wait for their table. They don't say much. They're both watching the street, watching the people passing by and the traffic. It's Friday night, so Flatbush is alive despite the ungodly humidity and darkening, stormy sky. A little inclement weather is clearly not going to deter people from enjoying a summer evening after a long work week. Steve's glancing around, wringing his hands a little bit between his knees, jittery and nervous and very clearly struggling with his anxiety. She's watching everyone else, too, out of habit, but she's also watching him. She's gotten good at doing that, at pretending to be cool and nonchalant while keeping an eye out for danger (what danger? You're safe here) and while studying someone more intently. She doesn't like the fact that he seems so on edge, so uncomfortable. She gets the feeling that, as long as it's been since she's been out with someone else, it's been even longer for him. He's stiff, eyes ahead for the most part but she catches them glancing her way more than once. And he winces sometimes, squeezing his eyes shut for the briefest second like he's in pain before he manages to overcome it. She doesn't like that most of all. His extra money feels like it's burning a hole through her handbag.

She wants to say something, thinks she should since he doesn't seem capable of it, but she doesn't know what. She doesn't know him. In terms of awkward moments, this is quickly becoming a bad one. He asked her out, but now that he has her out, he doesn't seem to know what to do with her. It seems to her he should be leading the conversation; that's probably the polite thing to do. But he's silent. That only makes her more worried and more curious. She's heard that soldiers who come back from war can have a lot of problems reintegrating into normal life. What they've seen and done sticks with them, changes them, and it's difficult to turn off mindsets needed for battle. Considering how poor his social skills seem to be, it's likely he's got a pretty serious case of that. There's more to it, though. More than once she notices him tense up when something particularly loud happens, a car horn going off down the street, for example, or someone squealing in what turns out to be laughter. The crowd's got him on edge, and she doesn't exactly understand why.

This isn't going to work. What did Maria say? He's screwed up. For some reason, it didn't occur to her until now just what that may mean. All the tidbits and pieces of information she has on him start to fall into place, and the picture it's making is one of a sad and broken soldier. As the uncomfortable silence between them drags on, she knows she should go. Make an excuse. Call this off, because she's already ill at ease enough without the added difficulty of his problems. Maria said that, too. You don't need the added baggage. All her excitement and composure is bleeding out into the hot, wet night, seeping right out of her as they both get tenser and tenser. She doesn't think she can coax him through a date and build up his confidence when she herself has no confidence. They can't both be this damaged.

The maître d' comes to take them to their table, though, and it's too late to back out. Nat takes a deep breath and follows behind Steve as they're led through the restaurant. It's a nice place, small but cozy and warmly lit, not swanky by any means but not poorly kept either. And it's packed with people, couples having dinner mostly. Young couples their age, starting their evening with a nice meal. Older folks who've known each other most their lives. A couple men together in a corner, flirting their way through tiramisu. Louder groups of friends. The wait staff is busy, bearing trays full of pasta and salad and bottles of wine. The atmosphere is fun and lively and happy. She can't remember the last time she's been somewhere like this, and she feels better, like the good mood is catching.