Shawn Mendes One shots

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"It can't go on like this forever... i can't go on like this forever.." You told your boyfriend with tears already flowing over your cheeks.

"But y/n.. you can't break up with me... i.. i'll do everything, but please don't do that to me, please." He said to you, looking deeper in your eyes than you ever thought was possible. He looked so sad, it was heartbreaking.

You almost felt guilty about what you said, but you meant it, it can't go on like this. You love Shawn so much, but you can't handle another 3 months without him, spending the whole day doing nothing but watching some netflix, play some guitar and cleaning some things.  You wanted you two to spent time togheter, to have fun, and to do things other 20 year old people would do too. You know how much Shawn cares about his music, and you completly understand that, you are so proud of him, but you suffer from it. You have to miss your boyfriend for days, weeks or months. And the days he is in Toronto, he spends al day in the studio with Andrew. You understand, but it hurts.. it hurts not having him around when you need him, not having him around to talk to him about anything, not having him to cuddle up on the couch, and spending your whole day watching harry potter with sushi take out. You miss him.

"I can't live like this anymore..." you whisper to him. "I can't spend weeks doing nothing, i can't spends weeks missing you. I'm sick of missing you. I don't even have a job or something. I'm just sitting here, waiting for you to come home.." you stare at him, looking for the right words, saying how much it hurts, how he can finally understand, how you feel.

He looks surprised about your words, sad surprised. He doesn't want to lose you, not now, not ever. You were the reason he got through al his good and bad days, you helped him lose his nerves when he is about to go on stage, you were the reason he could appreciate life to the max.. And he doesn't regret a single second he has spended with you.

"Shawn, c'mon, you've got to understand this is not a way of living a life. And you have probably tons of girls who would die waiting for you in your condo everyday, so when you are back they can fuck you the whole day long."

And the second that sentence slipped out of your mouth, you knew you screwed up. You saw his pain and anger containing every second that passed.

"are you fucking serious here y/n? I spend every second of my life, thinking about you since we've met. I love you so freaking much but apparently you don't get that. You just think every girl that flirts with me gets to fuck me."

"no, i didn't-"

"You know what y/n, i don't fucking care what you think right now, cause apperently you don't give a fuck about me loving you endlessly. " And with that, he walked out of your comfy living room, into your shared bedroom, and slammed the door. You just stood there, feeling awful about your words. You knew Shawn would never cheat on you, you knew he is so loyal to you, its like a fairytale. Why did you had to mess this up.

You whiped the tears on your cheeks away, and started walking to the door of your bedroom. What are you even gonna say?  You thought by yourself. But the second you turned of al your thoughts you knocked on the door. "this was a bad idea" you whispered really quietly to yourself.

You heared him grabbing the door handle, and he slowly opened the door. He just stand there, looking at you with swollen hurt eyes. You know this time you really hit him hard.

"listen baby, i'm sorry, i'm really really sorry, i shouldn't have said that, i didn't know what came into me, i know you would never do something like that."

"its alright, i know." he said, still sounding more sad than you ever thought was possible. He walked over to you and pulled you in a hug. Just a silent hug, but nothing akward, you were happy he did that. And you thought everything would be alright, until he broke the silence,

"i'll stay at Brians tonight"