Just A Princess

Chapter 26

Chapter 26

Juice and I walk into the house and I head straight for the shower. Juice gives me my space. I step into the shower and as the water cascades over me, I slide down the wall and sob into my hands. I can't believe he tried to leave me like that. As the water starts to get cold, I turn it off and grab a towel. I just sit there on the side of the tub in a daze. I must have been here for a few minutes because Juice knocks on the door before opening it. "You okay?" he asks as he kneels in front of me. "I don't know." I tell him. "Talk to me baby." he says. "I don't know where to start." I tell him. He helps me stand and helps me dry off and get dressed. We head out to the living room and he hands me a cup of tea. "Did he tell you why he did it?" he asks and I nod. "You have to promise not to get mad." I tell him. "Okay." He says. "He did it because he said he still loves me and that he wouldn't do anything to come between us but he couldn't handle the pain anymore of knowing he hurt me when he cheated." I tell him. "You still love him?" He asks me and I just shrug. "Do you still love him?" he asks again, softly. "That's the thing. Hap has become my best friend but I do still love Koz but I love you too." I tell him. "Do you regret getting my crow?" he asks.

"Absolutely not. I love you more than anything. I meant every word of that and I still want to marry you but Juice, when I saw him lying there and that syringe, I felt like part of me died." I tell him. "Why don't we talk to Koz and see what we can work out." he says. "What do you mean?" I ask. "Be with both of us." he says. "What? No." I tell him. "Do you still love him?" he asks. "Yeah." I say. "Do you love me?" he asks again. "Yeah." I say. "Then we will see what we can work out." he tells me. "Are you going to be happy with that?" I ask. "As long as you still love me and I still have you? I'm happy." he tells me.

The next morning, I ride to the clubhouse with Juice. Getting off the bike, I ask again "Are you sure about this Juice? We don't have to say anything. We can talk about it more if you aren't sure." I tell him. "I'm sure baby. Go check on him and I'll join you shortly and we'll talk to him about it." he says before kissing me softly. "I love you." He says. "I love you too." I say. I walk into the clubhouse, stop to hug Happy and Tig. "How is he?" I ask. "Hasn't said much this morning but ate a little." Tig says and I nod. I kiss Juice one more time before heading to Koz's dorm. Knocking on the door, I hear him say "Come in." I walk in the door and see him sitting up in bed, looking at his sobriety chip. "Hey." I say. He looks up and sees me and looks back down at the chip. I walk over and sit on the side of his bed and he asks "You remember when I got this?" I nod and say "Yeah. I was so proud of you." He wipes his cheek and says "Will you ever look at me like that again?" Taking his hand I say "Yeah. I will. But, Koz, you can't do that shit anymore. I need you here." I tell him. "You have your Old Man." he says. "I do and I have Tig and Happy but Koz, I...need...you...too." I say. He looks up at me and I wipe the tear that falls from his eye. He doesn't say anything. "Please promise me you won't try that again. That you won't leave me again. Please. I need you to promise me." I say as the tears start to fall. "Hey. Hey." he says as he pulls me to him and I sob. "I won't. Fuck, Princess. I won't. Okay? Just please don't cry." he almost pleads. I get myself together and we hear the door open.

Juice walks in and asks "How you feeling brother?" Koz nods and says "Okay I think. Didn't mean to hog your Old Lady." Juice takes the chair that's next to the bed, by where I am sitting and says "We want to talk to you about something." Koz looks at him and Juice continues. "Maci and I were talking last night. I know my Old Lady loves me. Got no doubt about that as much as she puts up with from my dumb ass, but brother, she still loves you too." Juice says. I look down at my hands and Koz asks "That true?" I nod but don't look at him and Juice continues. "That shit last night? That almost killed her man. Shit started hitting her. We talked about it and we ain't opposed to another crow being added to the one she has." Juice says and Koz's eyes go wide. "Are you serious?" Koz asks. "Yeah. Not right away but we talked about it and she wants to be with both of us and I told her we would talk to you about giving this a shot and seeing how it goes and if it works out, adding your crow to mine." Juice says. "That what you want Maci?" he asks tilting my head up to look at him. "Yes." I say. He looks into my eyes and I say "When I saw you last night, lying here, that syringe, I thought I was dying. My heart stopped. I meant what I said. I forgave you for that shit. I need you here just like I need Juice." I tell him. He looks at Juice and asks "You sure about this brother?" Koz asks. "It was my idea." he tells Koz. "Can I kiss our girl?" he asks. "Go ahead." Juice says. Koz looks at me and pulls me to him and kisses me softly and I feel the tears start falling again. It was a sweet and simple kiss. When we pull apart, he looks at me and says "I promise I won't mess up again." I start laughing and say "That seems to be the theme these days." Juice and Koz laugh with me. I'll give you guys a few but nothing happens until we talk this shit out and set ground rules." Juice says. "Absolutely brother." Koz says and I look at him and say "Thank you." He kisses me softly and says "I love you." I smile and say "I love you too."

Juice heads to the main room and Koz looks at me and asks "You sure about this?" I nod and say "Yeah. I even asked Juice when we got here if he was sure and he is too." I tell him. He leans forward and kisses me softly. "I love you Maci." he says. "I love you too." I say. "But I mean it Koz. No more of that shit. You can't leave me." I tell him. "I won't baby. I promise. Thank you so fucking much." he says. "Don't thank me. Thank Juice. Like he said, this was his idea." I tell him. I kiss him one more time and ask "You feel like coming out here and eating something?" He nods. I help him out of the bed and see he's in only his boxers. Helping him get dressed, I help him walk out to the main room. Seeing us coming around the corner, Happy and Juice come over to take over helping him while I go to the kitchen to get him something to eat. I see Gemma in there getting lunch together. "Can I fix Koz a plate?" I ask. "Sure baby. How's he doing?" she asks. "Better I think." I tell her. "You find out why he did it?" she asks. "Yeah. Let me take this to him and we'll go somewhere to talk." I tell her and she nods. Handing him his food, I kiss his cheek and kiss Juice and say "Me and Gemma are going to talk."

Walking into the office, she closes both doors. "Spill and I want to know what happened with you when you left too." she tells me. "He said something earlier yesterday about me remembering that he loved me and that made me worry so I told Happy about it to keep an eye on him. Last night, I was looking for him to check on his and so was Happy when we found him like he was. He was trying to make the pain stop. Never forgave himself for cheating on me and hurting me. Gemma when I saw him like that, I thought I lost him." I tell her and the tears start to fall again. "What happened when you got home?" she asks. "I was so fucking lost. I just didn't know how to comprehend what happened. I almost lost him. Shit started hitting me and I realized I still love him." I tell her. "What about Juice?" she asks. "I love him too. So, Juice and I talked and he suggested me being with both of them." I tell her. "He suggested that?" she asks. "Yeah and I told him several times he didn't have to do this because I loved him more than anything and wasn't leaving him but he said that he was okay with it and wanted me to be happy too." I tell her. "Did you talk to Koz?" she asks. "We did but nothing is set in stone until we get the ground rules sorted out. Not getting the crow right now but just seeing if we can make it work and if we can then I'll be adding a crow and if not then we'll figure it out then but he has to stay sober." I tell her. "That's good Sweetheart." she tells me as she hugs me. I get myself back together and we head back into the clubhouse.

Walking over to where Koz is sitting at a table now, I sit in the chair between Koz and Juice and just listen to the conversation. "You okay?" Juice asks. "Yeah baby. I'm good. Just downloading Gemma." I tell him. Juice speaks up to the ones at the table. "We need to tell you something." he says. Maci, Koz and I talked about some things and Maci is with both of us. We're telling you all this so that you don't think that something is going on that shouldn't be." Juice tells them. "You good with that little girl?" Happy asks. "Yeah. I am. You good with it?" I ask and he smiles and says "Long as you're happy, I'm good." He says and looks at Koz and Juice and says "But either of you hurt her again? Brother or not, you're mine." They both nod and I feel them both lace their fingers with mine.