Can You Save Me?

Chapter 8

Since I tried suicide, the hospital was making me stay and get treatment for 72 hours. 3 days of hell. But maybe it was what I needed. Louis was being very supportive, and hasn't left my side. The rest of the boys, I refused to see. I was scared they were going to act awkward around me, or treat me differently. 

"They love you the way you are," Lou kept saying. I just wasn't ready to face them yet. Niall and I had gotten really close since I met them, and I was afraid he would judge me. 

Louis and I were talking and laying on my hospital bed. It was nice having someone be there for me, and believe in me. I looked up at him, into his shining eyes. 

"I love you," I said, pecking his lips. Yes, I can finally admit it. I love Louis Tomlinson. I just don't want to get hurt again. 

"I love you more," He stated. I smiled, leaning against him.

"I don't want to go to this class. I don't want to talk about my problems in front of people I don't know." I said. In order to be released from the hospital, I had to go to an AA kind of group. We share our stories, and talk about how we can overcome them. In my opinion, it sounds like bull shit. 

"I know you don't, but maybe it'll help. And I'll be waiting for you at the door when you're done," He reassured me. As if it were right on cue, Dr. Klobeski walked in the room. Yes, I had him as my doctor again. I'm surprised he isn't sick of me by now. 

"Hello Harmony, are you ready for the meeting?" I sighed and reluctantly let go of Louis hand, following Dr. Klobeski to the room. Not before looking back at Lou, who stood with his hands in his pockets. he whispered an 'I love you' and walked back. 

When I got to the room, I saw there was about five other girls my age sitting in a circle in chairs. Also seated was a women with glasses and a clipboard. She must be the shrink. I sat down next to a short girl with green hair and a pretty girl with dirty blonde hair, and eyes that I couldn't tell were green or blue. She smiled at me and I returned the favor. I looked at her wrist (a habbit I developed after I started selfharming) and noticed one direction bracelets, covering scars. She saw me looking at her and nervously adjusted her shirt and hair. She had One Direction playing on her ipod.  

"Hi, I'm Harmony." I smiled, introducing myself. 

"Hey, I'm Natalie," She said. Her smile was really pretty. We sat there awkwardly for a minute, not knowing what to say. We had around ten minutes until the meeting started. 

"What are you here for?" I asked, suddenly regretting it. Her gaze drifted as she swept into deep thought. Tears effortlessly fell from her eyes. 

"I'm so sorry," I said, grabbing a tissue for her. She took it gratefully. 

"No, it's fine. Just memories," Natalie replied. 

"Do they just haunt you, constantly? Like they're always with you?" I asked, wondering if her situation is similar. She nodded.

"Yeah. Do you ever have voices telling you how worthless and fat and ugly you are? That you're never going to be good enough?" She asked. Oh thank the lord, someone finally understands me! We talked until class started. Most of the class was just everybody talking and saying why they're here. Turns out, Natalie was bullied through school, too. She's so pretty and nice and hilarious and it sucks that she doesn't see it. 

"Do you have a cell phone?" I asked. "Because I'd love to get together another time. It's great having someone who understands what I'm going through."

"I would love too!" She said. We exchanged phones. Since she loved One Direction so much, I thought it would be fun to invite her over. 

To: My new bestest friend in the world;) mothafucka

Hey I was wondering if you wanted to come over for dinner to hang out and mayb spend the night? I have a few friends I want you to meet!

From: My new bestest friend in the world;) mothafucka

Yess I'd love too! Cant wait lol xxx

I was always confused on why people in London said "xxx: after everything. Like, what's wrong with the "O's" huh? I texted her the address, and then called Lou. 

"Hey baby," He said immediately. "How was the meeting?" 

"It was really good. I made a new friend! And she's a fan of you. So I invited her over my house and I was wondering if you and the guys could come over and meet her and make her day." I finished in one breath. 

"Of course we can. I'm glad it went well." I could hear him smiling as he talked. He's a keeper.

"Yay thank you!! Be over at 8," I finished. After we hung up, I finally got released from the hospital. But I still had to come every week to go to the class. Slowly, the hours went by until it was finally 8! 

knock knock 

I ran to the door and opened it, welcoming the boys who all embraced me with hugs. There were a bunch of 'I miss you's' and 'i love you's' until I got to Niall. I opened my arms for a hug, and he pouted and crossed his arms. 

"You, missy, have been ignoring me," He said, finally giving me a hug. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered into his ear. "But if it makes you feel any better I invited a new friend over and I think you two will get on." He smiled widely and squeezed me tighter. We all sat on the couch and talked until I heard another knock on my door. 

"Hey!!" Natalie said, greeting me with a hug. 

"Hey," I said. "So you like One Direction, right?" She rolled her eyes. 

"I am a one hundred percent directioner," She replied. She is not going to expect this. 

"Well I have a surprise for you," i lead her into the room where the boys were. 

"Hello, love" They said, smiling. She gasped and stood there. Tears started forming in her eyes, as she just looked at the boys. 

"Whats wrong, love?" Niall asked, getting up to comfort her. 

"You guys are my idols. Niall, you saved my life," She said, as tears threatened to shed. Niall whiped them away with his thumb. 

"Well I am honored to help a beautiful girl like you." He said, smiling and looking deep into her eyes. We all decided to watch a movie together. We watched "October Baby" which was so sad. I was sobbing into Louis chest, as he rubbed my back comfortly. Liam and Zayn were cuddling together, and Harry was crying into a pillow. I looked over at Natalie, who was snuggling into Niall, who was whispering profanities into her ears. When the movie was over, I led them to the guest rooms. Niall and Natalie had fallen asleep, cuddling together on the floor. I decided to leave them there (after taking pictures to show them later) 

"Come on," I said to Lou, going to my room. He looked confused. 

"Where are we going?" He asked. Sometimes I really wonder if he's slow. 

"My room.." I said obviously. He wiggled his eyebrows, picked me up, and ran to my room, throwing us onto the bed. Laughing,we just wrestled until I had him pinned. 

"I win," I said, winking. The feeling of making him blush was amazing. I leaned down, so our lips were barely brushing. Before he could lean in more, I rolled over onto my side of the bed, laughing. 

"No fair!" He pouted. Oh Louis.

"Sorry Lou, you're not getting any tonight," He jokingly sighed, and wrapped his arms around my waist. When I was about to fall asleep, I heard him talking. 

"I know you're asleep, but I just want you to know I love you so much. I don't understand why you hurt yourself, and it kills me. You are the most beautiful, amazing, confusing, enlighting girl I have ever met. And I hope one day I can see you're beautiful self in a white dress, walking down the isle to meet me. I love you," I fell asleep with a smile on my face, and my heart touched.