A Dark Heart - Rhysand's Sister Fanfic AU

S E V E N

crushed

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"Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness. 

It took me years to understand that this too, was a gift."

―Mary Oliver

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+eralyn

Lorcan.

A long history I did not want to delve into at the moment.

After five hundred years of being each other's support system, it was impossible to not know what was wrong when it came to each other. I knew he didn't want me to leave as this was an argument we had a long time ago. It wasn't hard to see that he was afraid that I wouldn't come back, and I had a hunch as to why that would be a bad thing for him.

It was something I didn't think about a lot, especially back then when I was mostly repulsed from the male gender after all those greedy males had taken or tried to take from me.

However, Lorcan was a male I trusted to guard my back in any situation. I knew that if I called, he would come because that's what we were to each other.

We leaned on each other for emotional, mental, and occasionally, physical support.

But I knew.

As soon as he slammed that door, I knew we weren't that anymore.

He had opened something much more.

...

I made a point to quickly winnow back to the townhouse. The last thing I wanted was Cassian doing something he would regret later, or Amren snooping in places she was not supposed to be.

I'd be lying if I said I was in my right mind. I felt that at any second, I could honestly have an attack. An attack was exactly what I felt coming on as I winnowed right in front of my front door. It's so funny because one feels safest in their own home, but now I was terrified. I had never considered this place my home though, not in the way that counts. I was usually always up at the castle or spending the night in some other male's bed. I regularly had more self-respect, but I'd rather not have the emptiness inside me eat me alive. Not now.

Especially right now.

Setting my face, I walked into the townhouse, sunlight blaring through the large windows that adorned the house. The curtains were open, as they had always been, and I found the three of them exactly where I had left them.

I sighed inwardly in relief. Them not messing up anything was not a problem I had to deal with at the moment, thankfully. The money issue came into my mind as I remembered what Cassian offered. I had the urge to bust out laughing, but deep within me, his offer tore me apart. Who did they think I was? It was undeniably true that I had changed, but I knew that no matter how many times I tried to shut it out, the young girl that was once I still lingered there.

I stood before them, chin high and spine straight. Fire soothingly flooded in my veins, letting me remember who I was, what I am, and what I must do.

Amren broke the silence first. "I presume you went to talk to your Queen? What was her name? Oelin? Aelin?" Her tone was haughty and taunting. The way she said, "your"  irked me. She knew how I was feeling so she knew how to get a rise out of me.

"It's Aelin," I snapped. Fire pulsed steadily now and sweat threatened to pour down my brow. I sighed out, trying to calm my nerves. "But, yes, I spoke to my Queen. She'll let me come with you all and do what I need to do. From there, I am ordered to let life take me where it will, whether it be here or... there."