Keeping it Within

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"Wish you could stay here in my arms, when you're right there."

New student siya dito sa school namin. First and second week ng klase namin, close pa kami. Ako lang ang nakakausap niyang babae sa classroom ng mga time na yun. Nag-karoon ako ng crush sa kanya noon, but I know that his dense.

Second month of school, nakapasok na ang isa sa mga bestfriends ko. Her name is Lea; she is the oldest in the class. And sobrang bait niya. She's been my friend since we were grade seven. Sa kanya ko sinasabi lahat ng nararamdaman ko. She is a good secret keeper, and a true friend. That's why I love her so much.

Pinakilala ko siya sa new classmate namin

"Donny, this is Lea. Lea this is Donny."

"Nice to meet you Donny." Masayang sabi niya, sabay taas ng kamay niya para makipag shake hands.

"Pleasure to meet you too Lea." Then they smiled at each other.

I'm so happy nanakilala niya na si Donny, I've been telling her that I have an eye on someone. Pero di ko sinasabi yung pangalan. She's fine with it though, kahit di niya malaman ang pangalan as long as I like the guy. They shook hands, pero nung tinignan ko si Lea. Her eyes look weird though. Why do I feel like my chest is about to hurt?

Me and Lea have different circle of friends. Pero isa pa rin siya sa bestfriend ko. We don't usually hang out lagi, minsan nga di kami nagpapansinan sa school. Pero we remain bestfriends, we may not show it sometimes but we know that we are here for each other.

Napansin ko rin na lagi nang nag-hahang out si Donny sa group nila. Is it just me or lagi ko na rin silang nakikitang magkasama? They even talk in front of me. Papaano sila nagging close? Bakit di na ako pinapansin ni Donny? Did something happen?


"Laughing with her and telling her stories, I wish I was her."

Months past and mas nagging close silang dalawa. Lea even told me that nag-chachat silang dalawa. She even told me that she had feelings for him. Pero sabi niya na manhid si Donny. When she told me that, sobrang clouded ng utak ko. When we talk about him, I just bit my lip to restrain myself from crying. Humihinga nalang ako ng malalim when I'm about to cry in front of her. But I'm a good actress; I let her believe that I'm going to support her.

"Thank you so much Kisses for listening. Hindi ko kasi alam kung kanino ko ito eh kukwento eh. It's hard to keep it from myself, kaya sinabi ko sayo." Then she hug me, "Thank you."

"Yah." I hug her back, so that she won't notice my tears. I quickly wipe it off, but when I'm about to she suddenly let go of the hug.

A worried expression is plastered all over her face, "Oh, why are you crying?"

"Ha! A...ano kasi... kasi... Na realize ko na dalaga ka na pala. Hahaha" I tried so hard to laugh, buti nakayanan ko pa.

"Yun lang pala! Pinakaba mo pa ako." She then wipes some remaining tear in my face.

"Wag ka na iyak. Mababawasan beauty mo." Biro niya, "Nakaka buwisit ka naman eh"

After our talk, I went straight in my hiding place. Doon ko nilabas lahat ng luha ko. I like Donny, pero walang nakakaalam nun kundi ako lang. Pumupunta lang ako dito kapag malungkot ako. I thought about it, did I push Donny away? Last time I check, okay naman kami.

Pumasok na ako sa classroom, and the first thing I saw is the two of them. They were laughing really load though, at kahit may iba't-ibang mundo ang mga tao dito sa classroom rinig na rinig mo sila. Timing is such a bitch. Kakaiyak ko lang ng dahil sa kanilang dalawa, tapos una bubungad saakin ay ito.


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