Even If I Die It's You

Chapter 14

Your  POV 

I felt like dying when I imagined the days to come without him in it anymore. My cries just kept getting louder. I couldn't hold the pain in .... it was too hard for me. Suddenly someone hugged me. I struggled to free myself from that person. I was too weak to even do that. I recognized that voice..... It was him...the one who  saved me. I  stayed put and cried into his arms wanting to find some comfort. But I couldn't understand why he was crying. I held onto his shirt not wanting him to leave me.... I felt my pain reducing with him next to me. He hugged me really tight and asked me to calm down... he was giving me comfort.

Morning came too fast and I was shocked to find myself sleeping on his shoulder...... I tried moving away without waking him but my hands were in his . That's when I saw his face......... Jungkook !?

Chanyeol 's  POV 

I stayed in the hospital that night to finish with all the paper works. I had to see his family....... It was painful to tell them the truth and watch them cry. I couldn't stay there for long hearing so many cries. By dawn I went home to get changed for school. I was the first one to come to class and what I saw was..... Jungkook and Y/N sleeping on each other's shoulders. I didn't know if she was there knowing that it was Jungkook..... it is not going to be good if she didn't know. As expected she was shocked when she woke up. Her eyes were filling with tears and she came running to the door. I caught her hand and pulled her out with me. We went to a park outside the school campus.

I explained everything to her.... including our past .... and about him recovering because of her. I told her that he likes her and also about the role of his sister in Jungkook's life.

She didn't know how to react.... she sat on the grass putting everything I told her together. 

Jungkook ' s POV 

I stayed awake until she slept. But when I woke up she wasn't there next to me. I ran out searching for her. I finally spotted her with Chanyeol. I ran to them and heard  everything he told her. They didn't realize my presence. I walked closer to Y/N.  I kneeled down in front of her  and started crying. She was having her eyes filled with tears . 

"I'm really sorry..... I'm being a pain for you  when I know you are already suffering a lot. I'm sorry for acting as if I never knew you..... I couldn't approach you... I was scared that you might push me away since your sister put my mom before both of your parents. Your sister is not the one to blamed . And   I asked her not to tell anything about me to you.......................................                       I should have never dreamt of having you by my side. I'm sorry for being the reason for you to get bullied at school. I'm sorry that you had to suffer being with me..... I'm sorry that I always mede your life hard and sad.....I'm sorry that I felt better when you came into my life but made your life difficult........ I'm the reason you are hurt.... Please forgive me....... "

She walked away after hearing me out. Chanyeol came to my side and comforted me. 

Your POV 

I walked away after hearing what Jungkook had to say. I didn't know whether I had to cry because Baekhyun left me or because I am the reason to make Jungkook's wound deeper to an extent that it might never heal again. I went in to my room and locked myself in there not wanting to hear an explanation from my sister.

I couldn't stop crying..... I'm the reason for the suffering of two people.  Baekhyun is gone.......... I didn't  realize that he was having a hard time himself. He just wanted to be happy during his last moments and I didn't make his last wish come true. Will I be able to solve Jungkook's problem.... Can I make him feel better since I am the reason for his wounds...........

___ MONTHS LATER ( After their Final EXAM ) ___

The first year came to an end very fast. Exams are over and today is our last day in this class. I haven't talked to Jungkook since that day.... it's  not because I didn't want to , I just couldn't.... I was scared that I would make it harder for him . I couldn't change Baekhyun's life ....is it possible for me to help Jungkook.  

It was already dispersal and everyone was excited for a long vacation. I bid goodbye to Tae and was heading home. That's when Chanyeol approached me. We talked for some time and then decided to visit Baekhyun 's grave today.  

Chanyeol 's POV 

I asked Y/N to come with me to visit Baekhyun. On our way we stopped by to get some flowers. She asked the Florist for some Peonies. We spent some time next to Bekhyun. We told him about the whole year and how we missed him. It felt good to open up after all these months.

Y/N also seemed to finally agree with her life being this way. She was back to her normal self playing around with everyone. Knowing that she's over with everything I asked her the reason she bought Peonies for him. She told me that peonies were the best way to express your affection to someone. She said that someone used to get it for her before but hasn't been approaching her anymore. I knew she was referring to Jungkook. 

"So will you accept that person if he comes to you?? " I asked.

"He won't come to me..... He is too good to approach me since he believes that I will be in pain the more he comes closer..... But I want to be with him and I will wait for him until he is ready no matter how long he takes... " she replied.

"What if that time never comes?? " I asked.

" If it won't . ...... then I will go to him. I won't leave him to suffer alone. I will stay with him . I won't repeat any of my mistakes.........................He is everything to me .................. Even If I die , he will be the only one for me.  "

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