Silent Screams

#1

Sometimes this feeling is just so strong, is so intense that I am not in the position to control it. It's just like it's been a long time that I haven't even mulled over it and somehow the way I am trying to overlook it, this is coming back with more stronger edges and maybe going to increase my consternation more than before. I am at a stage where I don't even know what would happen or maybe I must foretell that I can make certain decisions that may ruin me or may make me. It just feels like a fire inside me burning me very badly holding my heart so tight and asking me to do things that I never wanted. It's just anything that is grasping me.. I ... I don't even know what it is I don't even know why it is,it just feels like I  need.. I need some help ,I need support, I need time ,I need someone's presence.. I don't want to be ignored, I don't want to be judged ,I don't want to be debased don't want to be...... .. I am empty deep inside I don't know why but it seems like I have a pure connection with sadness, with grief. I know I am mad I know iknow this feeling of getting indulged in such pain, in such prisons is worst  but I don't know why i have them. I don't want to feel like being shared ,I don't want to talk ,I don't want to be good enough, I don't want to face anyone, its like some time when everything seems bad and I am not me anymore.