GLOW-UP

40 | love equation

as hard as it must be for anyone and everyone to imagine, taeil had never invited a boy over to the apartment before.

he hadn't really even had a friend over if he was honest, since he'd stuck around yuta, and by association sicheng, since high school and hadn't branched out much from there. doyoung didn't count as 'inviting a boy over' because he was, well, doyoung, and they had literally just worked on an assignment in silence for four hours since they were obliged to, being lab partners.

so, even though johnny was supposed to be coming over to 'do the math assignment', it didn't really feel like that to taeil.

"open up, slave! it's freezing out here - do you want me to die?"

jumping to his feet at the sound of johnny's voice, taeil headed for the door, uneasy with nervous anticipation. he brushed down the front of the fuzzy white sweater he wore and took a deep breath, unsure what to expect when he swung the front door open to meet johnny on the other side.

as it turned out, it wasn't much to get excited over.

"took you long enough," johnny snorted, pushing past taeil into the apartment, "afternoon, moony." he reached out and ruffled taeil's hair as he went past, leaving the shorter rather confused.

it was just johnny - ordinary johnny, like any other day. taeil didn't know what he'd been expecting, but the half a dozen scenarios he'd imagined had all been very different to this. why was johnny so nonchalant about it all? had he done this with so many girls that it had lost all meaning? as taeil watched the american sink into the sofa pillows, he felt a flicker of betrayal.

since the hockey team celebratory dinner, the dynamic in their relationship had shifted from awkward uncertainty to secretive flirting. johnny liked to rest his hand on taeil's thigh through the entire duration of their math lectures, under the desk so nobody would notice, making it notoriously difficult for taeil to concentrate. he would call the gestures an overdose of pda if any of it was actually public. they'd gotten into the habit of sneaking around the back of the math department to make out in between lectures, but the area seemed to be a popular spot for couples to get a bit handsy, so the make out sessions often ended as quickly as they began, to avoid detection from other students.

despite all of that, taeil couldn't figure out his relationship with johnny at all. for one, not having a life threatening crush on taeyong for the first time in what seemed like forever was weird as heck. doing stuff with johnny was a complete turnaround and sometimes taeil was sure he'd lost his mind. but at the same time he was enjoying the attention too much to think about how johnny was dealing with it all.

after all, he was supposed to be straight, wasn't he?

"tea?" taeil blurted suddenly.

a cup of tea was his go-to when he didn't know how to handle a situation (which was most of the time) and he really wasn't sure how to deal with this one. any johnny that wasn't 'confident johnny' was a foreign concept to taeil. and as much as he liked 'soft johnny' when he took care of him, johnny always knew exactly what he was doing, led the conversations, never faltered even for a second.

"huh?" johnny snapped out of his thoughts and looked over to where taeil was standing behind the kitchen counter.

"or coffee?" taeil cleared his throat. "did you want tea or coffee? or... something?"

johnny gave a wry smile and shook his head. "nah," he told him with a chuckle, "god, sorry, i'm being such a downer... come here."

taeil tilted his head as he tried to figure him out, but his lack of social skills left him with little ability to read people, and he failed again. instead, he did as he was told and crossed the room to curl up into the couch next to johnny.