S.A.P

#2: The Beginning

"Hey man, how much for the new stuff you got?" I asked him as I looked on my phone at my bank account balance. As I saw that my account was looking a little low it hit me. I forgot to pick up my damn check from work. "Well shit I got to go get that now" I thought to myself. For a moment I forgot I was on the phone. "Uh yeah that sounds good. See you in about an hour?" I asked him. "Yeah sounds Gucci" he replied. God he was so stupid for saying that. I have no idea why he thought that was cool. As he hung up the phone I got ready to go pick up my check and deposit into the bank. I should have just set up direct deposit but for some reason I always put it off. Before I left the house I always made sure I had everything I needed like my water bottle, wallet, phone and headphones. I didn't drive so instead I rode my bike everywhere I needed to go. Which was basically only work and home. With no car radio to play I just put my playlist on shuffle. Also I was getting in some exercise which is always a plus. As I walked out the door I noticed that Casper's bowl was empty. Had to get some cat food for him as well. Outside looked as if it was going to rain sometime that night. Clouds were grey and casting a shadow that prevented much sunlight from getting through. Town was only a fifteen minute bike ride, so round trip? About half an hour, forty-five minutes max. That was cutting it close because I did want to make my dealer wait for me. I quickly put a song on and jumped on my bike. A delay in my phone didn't play the song until I started to pedal and gain speed. First in line was "Hey You" by Pink Floyd. I feel that the universe played that song first to get me in the mood for the adventure I was about to take. The band literally falls under the genre of psychedelic rock. I'm not sure if any of them actually did any psychedelics but can't imagine they didn't with the songs they played. As the song began, I listened closely. How it made me feel so I can get an idea on how it might go tonight. It wasn't that I was scared but rather to be prepared for if something did happen. I love Pink Floyd's music. This song hasn't played in a long time. It begins so soothing and relaxing that builds into this epic triumph with its sounds but while the lyrics are painting a totally different picture. The last line "Together we stand, Divided we fall" always hits me hard. Next on shuffle was "Dreamer" by Ozzy Osbourne. Every time I hear it I cant help but think about John Lennon's "Imagine" with it's similarity to the message that they portray. As the music kept on playing I took in the wind blowing across my face while I forced against it. It felt so nice and the sky only added to the good feelings. To me a gloomy looking day sparks happiness and positive thinking. I prefer a thunderstorm over a nice sunny day if I was to pick between the two. Time really flies when you're not focused on it. Before I knew it I was riding right into the parking lot of my work. Pisses me off that they don't have a bike rack so I have to lean it up against the side of the building. With nothing to lock it up to. Surprisingly I haven't come out to see it missing. I stepped up to the doors and when they open up you would immediately feel a wave of cool air hit you. It wasn't busy, half the registers weren't open and only a person or two in line at the ones that were open. I don't even know what day it is....shit I think Josh is the floor manager today. He's a fucking dick to all of us. Not only the staff, but the customers too! He has the most customer complaints than any other manager and he is still employed here? I was talking with a new guy that on his second day of working he had to deal with Josh and before he even met him he rolled his eyes to him and said "Ah great, new guy". Asshole! I opened to the door to the employee's locker room only to see him sitting at the manager's desk. I thought to myself "Ah fuck me". As I came around the corner to enter he looked up and asked me what I wanted. "You know what today is, I want my money" I blurted out so suddenly. He opens up a drawer and flips through others paychecks to find mine "Also need the paper work for setting up direct deposit". He glared at me looking a bit pissed off. After he found my paycheck, he opened up the filing cabinet next to him to grab the other paperwork. My check wasn't to much. Also picked up Casper some fancy wet food for dinner before I got out of there. Was out in five minutes. Off to the bank it was before I headed home. Sadly that's what took longer than expected. There was a line and one dude had one of those jugs you put use for a office water dispenser full of coins. The machine really took it's sweet ass time to count it all up. All I did was deposit half my paycheck into my account and cash the rest and it took 20 minutes. Worst part is on my way home I totally forgot my guy was coming over. I pulled in as he was literally about to leave. I didn't know he had to work today. I quickly pulled out cash for him and as he handed me the syringes, he told me to keep my phone on me so he could text me to make sure I'm alright. He then quickly pulled out of my drive way but before he could get to far I yelled to him "Josh is working today!". Didn't hear what he said but I heard him yell back. I'm not going anywhere else for the rest of the night so I parked my bike under the deck. That way it wasn't easily visible for someone to steal it. As soon as I raise my head, I see Casper waiting in the window. Poor dude is hungry. Dashing inside, I dropped everything on the table to reach in my pocket. Casper's going to be really excited, I got the good shit for him. Stuff is $2.50 a can so it better be good. I also love how it's easy to open with those pull tabs instead of having to use a can opener. As soon as the food touched the bowl, Casper was on that like flies on a animal corpse along the side of the road. I pet his head and said aloud "Happy Friday buddy" as if he could hear me. Totally not crazy, right? Now that he was fed it was time for me to get set up for a good time. I grabbed my phone and the syringes off the table only to move to the living room. The couch, calling me. I sat down and turned on my game console. Video games are always a good place to start for smoking, so why not for this too? The syringes hold up to 150ml but I didn't know how much that is. Like I wasn't sure how much I was supposed to take. Not wanting to over do it, I thought I would start low and if nothing happened then just up the dosage. My guy said I would have to take the whole syringe. I squirted it into my mouth and swirled it all around. Shit tasted nasty I must admit so it was pretty difficult to get it down my throat but I managed to do it. As soon as it hit my stomach I felt uneasy. It was obvious that it wanted to come back up but that wasn't going to happen. I concentrated really hard to keep it down until my body gave up and was able to keep it down itself. After that it was only a matter of time for it to kick in. Wish my dealer would have told me how long it would take before it took effect. So when it did take effect it would be a total surprise and I'm not sure if that's a good or bad thing. Best to relax and not get paranoid unless I wanted my first time to be a negative experience. I picked up my controller and began to play some video games. Not sure really what to play. don't want to play anything that might cause me freak out so nothing with monsters. Fuck it, lets go with a simple platformer. Haven't played Mega Man in a while. Scrolled past the opening menu quickly and began running. Best way to play platformers is to just run and gun. Always moving around while avoiding enemies. I'm glad today I chose to be persistent. As the playthrough continues I start to remember why I gave up on this game for a while. It took me forever to beat the first boss and now again with the next. I think the game is just a little harder then the rest. I always play the hardest difficulty unless it's too hard. All the other platformers I ever played weren't like this. I must say it draws me in more though. Always find myself playing it again ever so often. The worst part is it's been so long that I lost the patterns for the first half the the level so it's taking extra long. Oh shit how could I forget? Let's get's some music up in here. Games like these are so much better with some other music that's not included in the soundtrack. Not saying anything bad about the soundtrack. The music included in the game is good because it's meant to move along with the story the game is telling as you play but to find other music that unintentionally goes along with it as well is way better. To find an awesome song that matches the tone of the level is mind blowing honestly. I find that EDM goes a long way here because to me it only adds to the futuristic feel that the game gives off already. Also super fun to have the character go along with the beat and try to go nonstop. When you lose a life, just simply get back to it without even thinking. Its only after losing all my lives and I see a game over screen is when I realized realize the clock on the wall is melting. I realized that it's starting to kick in. I grabbed my phone to check the time and realized it's only been twenty minutes. Damn it seemed longer than that. Looks like I already lost the concept of time, that only happens when I get stupid baked hahahaha. I feel I should go check out the clock. I get up and walk over towards it noticing I left behind foot prints that glowed bright neon colors. Every step I took alternated what color it would glow. When I reached the clock it was already half way down the wall. It just looked like paint dripping. I used my hand to scoop up some of the thicker stuff before it got to the floor. I felt wet and cold, just like paint would. I didn't know this drug was going to alter my perception of touch. It's like anything I've ever had before. I got so much of it in my hands that it drips a little to the floor. The spots that hit the floor seem to be expanding, slowing engulfing the entirety of the floor. What's in my hand begins to run down my arm, filling me in as if I'm the canvas. I don't know what to do so I threw it on the wall. It splattered on a good portion of the wall. It began to color in the spots it missed just like it did on the floor. It fills a the whole wall with random spots of black, white and red. It wasn't done there. When the wall was completely covered, the colors started to shift and divide to put a bunch of clocks on the wall. They even worked. So now I just have a wall of clocks. I couldn't believe all this. In excitement, I decided to take a look outside. Pushing the curtains away, everything was different. With little time that passed I knew in the real world the sun was still setting. Instead it looks as if night has taken over. I sky was the most beautiful shade of purple with a bright orange moon to accompany it. It was a bit windy outside. I could tell because I could see different colored strings fly across the lawn and moving the leaves of the tree along. It's trunk shines a bright white. Each leaf a different color creating a rainbow tree. My dirt driveway was replaced with a cobble stone road made of all kinds of different jewels. The actual road now just looks as if I was to fall in to it I would drift out into space, never to be seen ever again. I don't want to go outside and test that theory out. I shut the curtains and head off the the kitchen to get myself a drink. Now my table is just floating. The legs are gone. The fridge was completely gone. In its place was was a portal that looked more like water. Like how you look into a pool and you see the inside of the pool at crazy aspects because of the water. On the other side was just all with with distorted objects were floating around all randomly. I put my hand through the portal, felt just like water too. Something hits my hand so my reflex makes me think to grab it. As it comes back to my side, it becomes more clear of what it was. I grabbed a Tupperware container with some cut up mango in it. Not thinking I tossed the container on the counter and just let loose and let my body fall right into the portal. This is the first time I've ever experienced zero gravity. To float there so weightless, it feels relaxing but yet quite concerning at the same time. Like after a long day at work it's nice to come home and sink right into your couch. I mean when I do that I feel like I'm floating but I could still feel the couch just a tiny bit. Here it's not the case. I've seen videos where they use fans to simulate zero gravity but there you can feel the air pushing up against you. It's just so insane to feel nothing and just float there like you're lighter than air. I spin my body around to look at all that was in my fridge. I saw a couple bags of sandwich meat and leftover pizza I ordered about a week ago. Don't think that is to good anymore. Right below my feet, a gallon of tea I made. In my head I really wished I didn't have to spin my body around just to grab it. Why couldn't I just have my feet go where my hands are and vice versa? As soon as that idea popped in my head, my fingers started to sink into my arms. As they run up my arms, down my torso and into my legs, my toes are doing the same. They intercepted in my knees. All toes and fingers are now in opposite locations, my hands and feet begin to reshape to accompany the changes. With those all fixed, I grab the gallon and drift towards the portals exit back into my kitchen. As I pass through, I still feel like I'm entering a pool but to emerge on the other side dry as a leaf in fall? What a feeling. Back in my kitchen, the gallon of tea is on the floor and my feet look to have been put back in the correct spot. I picked up the gallon from the floor and grab a glass from the shelf. Now all that this drink needs is some ice. The portal only included the fridge, so where's the freezer? I look all around the kitchen, from floor to ceiling, the only thing that sticks out is now there is a projector screen all rolled up with a string dangling down. I reach out and grab the string bringing the screen closer to me. Imprinted on the screen was an image of a small ice box. I reach my hand in. Looks like it's another portal. Only hand is in and it looks like it's been painted in. Wonder what the inside looks like. The door swings open to reveal a small civilization. It's snowing, Igloos are all over the floor. In the way back is a huge stack of premade ice cubes. Every 30 seconds a cart with a an ice cube on drives by and drops it into the pile and goes back around. I reach back and grab a few ice cubes from the top of the pile. My arm was so cold going into that thing. I wonder how all the people are able to stay warm in there for the entirety of their lives? Before I kept asking to many questions I shut the door and removed my arm from the screen, rolled it back up and dropped the cubes into the glass. What an adventure just trying to get a drink. Heading back to my living room, I noticed my recliner grew some fur. Better not sit there in case it grew more than just fur. I don't want to get eaten. So instead I put my drink on the coffee table and took a seat on my couch. Didn't look any different but boy did it feel different. I began to sink in a little bit, the couch conforming to the shape of my body. Most comfortable experience of my life. Time to see what we can find on tv. I pull out my phone and pull up the app that acts as a remote because I lost the remote a long ass time ago and if sober me cant even find it I know there's no way in hell I'll find it in this state. My phone displayed a hologram of my lock screen when the power button was pushed. An interactive hologram. Major upgrade I must say. Clicking on the app just displayed a a image display of my remote that came with the thing. As soon as my finger touched the button, the image suddenly materialized into a physical form and fell into my lap. Putting my phone away I use the remote to flip through the channels. Not to much on but oldies like Mama's Family and Laverne and Shirley, a couple game shows and soap operas. Another couple minutes go by and still haven't decided on something to watch so I turn off the tv. "Screw this" I said to myself. I remember reading something about something you should do when tripping. Like some activates. One said to look into a mirror, see how you see yourself. The closest mirror was in my bedroom. It's a handcrafted dresser vanity type thing, Grandpa made it for my grandma on her 30th birthday. Been in my family for a long time. I walk into my bedroom and turn to glance into the mirror. My eyes take a stroll to examine around my surroundings. Looks like the dresser stretches and curves back in continuedly just as it was inhaling and exhaling. My eyes return back to my reflection. To my surprise, everything I see in the mirror is as it should be. Normal. I take a look back and look over my room to see everything is switched around, some things are now on the ceiling and on opposite walls, pictures flipped, utter chaos. Really hurts my head. I'm sticking with the mirror for now. I turn my head back to look at my face. As a few seconds go by I noticed my hair was slowly getting longer. A beard even began to grow. I didn't think it was possible with the genes in my family. It just kept growing and growing getting so long it looked as I had achieved a Gandalf beard and my hair was down to my feet. I got so excited that I blinked and when I opened my eyes again, it was all gone. My hair went back to the way it was before it all grew. So much happening, I thought that was the peak of it all. Then again, I was betrayed by my mind. In the mirror there was an orange dot in the middle. Suddenly it started to spin. The resulting circle of light it created emulated a sparkler being spun around. In this case creating a portal. As the the portal got bigger an image began to formulate. When the portal was done opening, the painting was complete. A bedroom, just a little bigger than mine. The walls were almost all covered with posters. Mostly band and movie posters from Sum 41 all the way to Sleepaway Camp. Couple bean bags on the floor with a cherry red Gibson SG guitar sitting in the corner. On the opposite side is where the bed laid. Someone sat on top of that bed. They saw me too because they walked closer. As they got closer I could tell it was a woman. Her hair was black but look like the ends were dipped into a light purple dye. She moved a chair out and sat down. It was then I could see her face clearly. Her eyes were brown as the dirt in the ground and under the left one was a scar. "Hello" she says to me. "You can really see me?" I asked back. She nods her head to confirm it. At least I know this is fake so I'll just go along for shit's and giggles. "My name is Rachel" she said. "I'm Adam" I replied. She looked confused for a minute. "I don't know anyone named Adam" she said. "I'm sorry what?" I asked back. She goes on about how she's hallucinating so her brain would have my name be associate with someone she knew. "Wait you're hallucinating too" I ask. She looks at me like I'm crazy. "Too? What do you mean by too?" she asks. I told her all about my drug trip leading up to meeting her. The whole time she's looking at me I can see her roll her eyes just a little bit. It was obvious she didn't believe me. " Such detail" she said to me as she chuckled so softly. "I'm hallucinating but not on purpose. I have really bad anxiety and severe depression so I snuck some of my aunt's medication. Hallucinations are a common side effect. When I started to see things I did a bunch of research on what the worst to expect is and how to get through it calmly and safely." she explained. "I can somewhat relate. I mean I tried this stuff because I wanted to try a full and fulling life but drugs shouldn't be the way to go. Subconsciously I did it to fill a void. I get really depressed because I feel like something in my life is missing. I always tell myself I have all that I want but still the feeling never leaves" I say. I look back up into her eyes and and ask her why she's depressed. "I grew up just fine until I was five years old when my dad walked out on my mom and I. He was a great father. He would take me to the park a lot and we draw together too. He always told me how good I was for a young girl and couldn't wait to see what they'd look like as I got older. I guess that was just lies. He never loved us. So now I always feel that no one could get to close to me because if they do I feel whatever it was that made my dad leave they will see too and not want anything to do with me anymore. I don't want to get hurt again and spend my life in pain. I only have my mom and my aunt. With no one else outside of them I also feel something is missing so it's a constant battle between that and not wanting to get hurt again." she said. A wave of sorrow hit me incredibly hard. I didn't know what to say to her. Usually people would say something short and sweet like oh I'm sorry that happened or Oh I'm sorry I didn't know that. No instead without a second thought it came out as "Wow I wasn't expecting a response like that. I mean that you would tell me that because that seem like I would be getting to close you know?" She comes back with "Always best to keep reminding yourself that what you're seeing when you hallucinating is not real so it's just talking to an imaginary friend. You're just a weird figment of my drug induced hallucination so it doesn't matter because you can't ever leave unless I want you to so I can tell you whatever I actually feel. Some people come out of these like it was therapy session. So who knows maybe that's what this is" and begins to laugh. It was like was like honey for my ear drums. I couldn't help myself but to smile. Just as soon as my smile appears, one begins to break out on her face too. That's when the portal made a sound as it was burning out and began to shrink. "See you again sometime Adam" she says to me as she waves. The portal completely closes and just a reflection of myself remains. I turn around and everything is back to normal. Looks like my trip was over. My phone was in the living room still, I'm to lazy to get it and check the time. Honestly I totally forgot when I even started taking it. I peeked out and my window and the moon was still in the sky but was going away quickly. Don't matter the time anyways. I'm extremely tired. I'll take a nap and figure everything out then. I stand up over to my dresser and turn on my fan then just let my body fall into the bed and rolled up more in the middle. A nice breeze on me makes it a lot easier. My eyes are closed. My body is very relaxed and my mind slips away. Here comes a good night sleep.