Okay, I lied.
Or I didn't lie, exactly, I just got inspired to write something else.
Something very short and bittersweet. You have been warned.
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What started out as just a stop on shore to pick up some supplies turned into a curious, then amused examination of an incredibly tawdry gift shop that made the Mystery Shack look like a bona fide museum. It wasn't like they were in a hurry to get anywhere right now, so it seemed like a fun opportunity.
Neither of the Pines men cared if they were being immature; they'd lost so much childhood that any chance to act young again was perfectly fine with them. They laughed over the tasteless snow globes (even if maybe it was a little too soon for them to be looking at those) and the hideous refrigerator magnets and marveled that there were people outside of Gravity Falls who could actually be conned into buying this stuff.
Then, while Stan was examining a display of decorated seashells and muttering to himself that he needed to tell Soos about the commercial opportunity here, Ford called over, "Stanley, I'm thinking about maybe getting some sunglasses for when we go to more tropical waters. How do these look?"
"Don't you need to get some that are prescription? Otherwise you're gonna have ta wear them over your-"
Stan straightened up to look at him-and flinched.
No, really. There was no misreading it; his shoulders tightened, and his jaw clenched, and for a full second he looked like he was either about to hit Ford or try to run away from him.
"Stanley?" Ford frowned, tilted his head. "Are you alright?"
Then he blinked and shook his head, and the spell was broken.
"Fine, fine. It's nothing. Just a trick of the light."
Well, now naturally Ford was suspicious. He twisted his head around and looked at himself in the closest mirror.
Oh.
Instantly he understood his brother's reaction.
All he needed was that tacky yellow overcoat, the hat, and that stupid mustache.
With a grimace Ford removed the sunglasses and put his regular glasses back on.
He wondered whether to apologize; both of them had been working on apologizing to each other more when things happened, since they had learned the hard way that unresolved hurt feelings could lead to even more horrible mistakes. On the other hand, maybe Stanley would prefer to pretend nothing had happened and an apology would only make him gruff and uncomfortable.
Before he could reach a decision Stan moseyed over, his expression suddenly resolute.
Grabbing another pair of sunglasses from the rack, he put them on over his own glasses.
"Hey Ford, who am I?" He folded his arms over his chest and said in a deadpan tone, "I'm not impressed."
Despite himself, Ford snorted. "I can do a better impression than that." He put the sunglasses back on, over his regular glasses this time like Stan, and straightened his spine, pointing his finger sternly. "You are taking boxing lessons, boy, and you are going to like them!"
Stan let out a bark of hard laughter, and snatched a necklace from a nearby rack, holding it under his neck dramatically. "You see this? This is my swankiest gold chain, and if I ever catch either of you touching it you're gonna be in solitary confinement for the rest of your lives!"
And if the ensuing laughter had a pained, bitter edge to it, well, they just worked harder to turn it into genuine laughter. Because maybe if they could turn it into a joke, it would have less of a sting.
********
As you might have guessed, I am not a member of the Filbrick Pines fan club. If such an organization even exists, which I have sincere doubts about.
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Gravity Falls Twangst
FanfictionA collection of Gravity Falls short stories that for the most part focus on relationships between twins. I'm new to Wattpad, so please be kind. These are reposted from FFN and AO3.