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as luke took the buds of violets and red in his clenched fist with him, he could feel the pair of golden eyes burning into the back his skull. he hoped it was just his anxiety manifesting. luke wasnt in the mood to go through a confrontation.
the dim lit irwin's home was indeed not as vacant as luke hoped for. ashton irwin was standing in front of the ruby curtains framing the balcony of his second floor bedroom. watching. he didn't bother much about hiding, it's not like he was the one trespassing.
thankfully ashton was the only one home. his younger siblings were off at school for atleast a few more hours, and his parents were busy at work. this was fortunate for the smaller blonde though, because there was no doubt in ashton's mind that if his mother caught the boy snipping off her prized flowers, the flowers wouldn't be the only thing that's been ripped out.
the hazel eyed boy stood his ground, staring at the blonde, stopping for a while and looking down with a frown on his face. his actions caught ashton's attention, and even though he failed to notice alot of things from up here, he could see how hollow and empty his eyes looked.
maybe it was the way his heart slightly clenched when he noticed how the boy's hands shaking, and how he struggled to even hold the knife still. who was he to care so much about someone he doesn't know. it wasn't like he liked those stupid and unprepossessing flowers anyways, his mom seemed to care more about them then her own children and it was starting to strike a nerve in him.
ashton let out an airy laugh. he was definitely not about to start being envious of some god forsaken weeds.
nevertheless, watching the boy was far more interesting than watching his mother care for them, so he stood still, watching.
ashton's hazel eyes trailed to the thin frame, watching him leave. he seems sickly and uncared for, with the jumper contrasted greatly against his distinctly pale skin, hanging off his shoulders and his knuckles laced with blue and pink. as luke made his way to the gate, he turned to face the house and even though his eyes were dimmed and sunken, the boy didn't fail to cause his breath to hitch at his throat. ashton struggled to find a distant memory where he he definitely seen the teenager before, and tested out a dozen names, but none of them seemed to fit his pretty little face.
ashton's hands clenched around the cold metal bars, then tightening them around his ruffled beach blonde curls. ashton was determined to find out who he was.
it wasn't that ashton was stalker or threat of some sort, he just wanted to know who the blonde boy was. with nothing much to pass time in this empty neighbourhood, it was intriguing to him. where was he going off to? ashton figured that luke was in college, and money was tight for students so he would probably not be able to afford a bunch of flowers every day. and luke was there like clockwork. everyday.
the question was, who was it for?
whoever it was, ashton was jealous.
not of luke though. sure, he had his looks. but ashton just yeared to be cared for. he was filled with a longing to be loved by someone enough that they were willing to gift him flowers even when all they could afford was out of someone's front yard. ashton just wanted to feel what it was to be loved.
all ashton could do was watch, and let his mind scream at him to stop being a pussy and confront him.
and ashton knew that luke was broken. sobs wracked through his body every night as he let his pillow in his arms grow heavy with the tears cascading his pale face. luke wasn't okay, and the only thing bringing him up with the sun was the thought of bringing flowers to his boy. it wasn't healthy, and luke knew that. if nothing else changed, and luke was left to wallow in his tears, it could only be days till luke was in his boy's arms again and it was only that thought that kept him going.
it would be selfish, letting his mom follow his same fate, picking out flowers for the gravestone for her last son.
luke supposed he could hang out for a while, attaching his mum to the strings of his heart. they were slowly stretching thin, and time was wearing it out, and just one snap, would cut off his lifeline and letting him fall into the pitch black darkness his heart desired to linger in. the same darkness that michael laid in. the same darkness, that michael was so afraid of.
staying in darkness was better than seeing him everywhere, not being able to hold him and comb through his hair while pressing soft kisses to his neck.
however much he could dream about michael didn't matter. he would wake up sweaty, heart hammering in his chest. alone. the only truth of michael ever existing was the deep pit he felt in his stomach that burned when his eyes would fill with tears. they say grief is love that had no where to go, and luke was full of it. where goes the grief go?
