Pink Floyd's Dusty Flat

Syd Stardust and the Davids from Mars

"Holy shit, that's David Bowie!" Syd exclaimed, jumping out of the bathtub. "Can I have your autograph?"

"Sure," David replied, "but what do I sign?" Syd thought of a million things to answer with, but instead said, "My left big toe."

"Okay, cool. I need a pen though."

"Hold on," Syd said as he created a small opening in the space-time continuum. He pulled out a blue pen.

"Here you go, David." David then proceeded to sign Syd's left big toe.

"So, you dig my new record?" David asked Syd.

"Hell yeah I do!!" Syd exclaimed happily. The two instantly hit it off, and Syd discovered that David was also a fan of Pink Floyd. Meanwhile, Nick stared in amazement at the sight before him--he was straight, but wow, was David Bowie elegant. He might have developed a bit of a crush on the star--hell, everyone who had listened to him probably had a crush on David. Roger had also gotten out of the bathtub to go converse with Syd and Bowie. Rick hadn't really listened to much of David's music, so he just stayed where he was. He played the two David Bowie songs that he heard on his kazoo--"Space Oddity" and "Life on Mars?" By the time he got to the second number, everyone had their hands over their ears.

"Oi, Rick, please shut the hell up!!" Roger yelled. The others uttered words of agreement. Just then, David said, "So, um, I've got to go...uh...have fun, guys!" He quickly T-posed and then faded into some other reality.

"Ugh, Wright, look what you did!" Nick pouted. "Now David's gone!"

"Why do you care so much? I mean, I guess it makes sense since you kept staring at him the whole time." Rick shot back.

"The fuck are you talking about?" Nick questioned, a blush rising from his neck. Syd and Roger stared at the scene, confused and somewhat slightly dazed. The bickering went on for another few minutes, until Syd piped up, "I just wanted candy. Roger, how'd you get us into this bloody mess?"

Roger shrugged. "Well, one day, I was at the bakery getting a baguette, and the woman working at the counter says, 'That'll be 9 pounds.'" Roger had a look of disbelief on his face. "So I said, 'Nine pounds? You're ripping me off! No way am I paying for that!' And I took the baguette from her hands and ran."

"You do realize that's stealing, right?" Rick pointed out.

"What?" Roger asked.

"What?" Nick asked.

Roger sighed. "Anyway, she chased me down the street, but I eventually dropped the baguette, resulting in her picking it up. By then, though, Syd and I had been beating each other up, so I didn't see what she did with it."

"Oh, I saw," Syd remarked, "She threw it into the space-time continuum."

"Makes sense." Roger replied.

"Well, what matters now is how do we get out? My clothes are soaked and I need to get home to my cats." Rick said.

"Hmm...well, I could phone up a friend." Roger suggested.

"And what the hell will that do?" Nick asked dubiously.

"I could phone (A/N: time doesn't exist in this anymore bear with me) Brian May."

"Ohhh, okay." Everyone seemed to reply in unison. After all, it did make sense. Brian May knew all about time travel, the space-time continuum, and many of the inner workings of the universe. Roger pulled out a telephone, plugged it into the wall, and called Brian. After some banter about the amount of work that it takes to get them all out of their bathroom prison, Brian agreed to the job. In about twenty minutes, Roger screamed, Nick yelped, Rick threw up, and Syd simply frowned. They all fell into a random hole, and soon enough, they found themselves back in a field somewhere in Cambridge. Roger, of course, continued to scream, and Syd pulled out a cigarette.

"Well, I kind of dig David Bowie." Nick stated.

"We know." Everyone replied.