We Don't Have To Dance

Chapter Eleven

"Hey" I go into Payale's dressing room, and they all look at me so I laugh nervously "Just thought I'd say high, and get familiar with you all, since we'll be spending a month together!"

"But after then we probably won't see each other again" Emerson smirks a bit, and Sebastian looks down

"I mean you don't know that for sure" Remington bunks Emerson a little "I think that's a great idea to get to know each other"

"Okay" I sing, then laugh awkwardly, sitting down on the floor

"You can sit on the couch" Sebastian furrows his eyebrows

"No" I sing, then we all laugh "So how did you guys pick the name Payale Royal?"

"My grandparents met in Palais Royale in Toronto, so we changed the name up a bit" Remington smiles

"And I'm guessing you guys stole the name indulgence over absence from our movie American Satan?" Sebastian asks and my eyes widen

I did kind of take that, but I say "We wanted to use mindless indulgence, but there's already a punk band named that" I shrug "So I thought that was a good name and so did Andy"

"Beirsack?" Emerson asks

"Yeah, we're really good friends"

"Just friends?" Sebastian laughs, and I start to get uncomfortable, why are they being so rude?

"Yeah, I shrug, I mean Andy is twenty nine and I'm eighteen so" they're eyes widen, and I blush a bit

"Your eighteen love?" Remington asks

"Uh, Yeah"

"How the fuck are you this famous?" Remington asks "How long have you even been in this band?!"

"Uh, Six months maybe"

"What the hell?" They all them to each other

"I've been tiring since I was sixteen" I admit

"Your parents allowed that?!"

"Yeah" I mumble, thinking about my anger towards my mom, I realize she probably just didn't care enough, and that's why she let me leave

"Jesus, what were they thinking?"

"Well it's a good thing they did cause look at me now, right?"

"I think so" Remington smiles

"Me too" I smile "I'm happy that I've come as far as I have"

"So your saying you've never slept with Andy?" Emerson asks, and Remington slaps him, so I laugh

"No" I lie, but I'm a pretty good liar "Most of my career I was in a relationship so"

"And now?"

"No" I sigh

"What happened with your mans?" Emerson days sassily so I giggle

"It's complicated"

"Bitch I need the deets!" Remington says, while Sebastian finally cracks a small smile

"He uh" I think of a way to say it that's soft, but when I realize there's not, I spit out "He killed himself" All there eyes widen, and I laugh nervously, then add "Basically what happened was he started abusing me, so I left him. He said if I left him he'd kill himself, but I didn't believe him, and he proved me wrong"

"Oh honey I'm sorry" Remington frowns

"No no, it's okay, I've turned the situation into a positive" I admit "Now I'm helping other people over come depression with both my music... as well as my national suicide hotline promotions. I'm a speaker for them, and surprisingly I've helped a lot. We've gotten over a thousand more volunteers since I started, as well as we've almost raised five hundred thousand dollars"