A Different Kind Of Love Story

1. Prologue

Here I am walking on the school grounds alone, again. Great feeling. I am used to it, though.
Why am I even complaining in the first place? Oh, yeah. Cuz that's all I can do, since I can't even make one friend. I kind of deserve this.
God damn it! I'm rambling again! Sorry.

Anyway, I am Den. The edgyest teenager on earth, to be more specific. I would say that I am normal, but I'm not, I mean I am crazy, you know. Afterall I am talking to myself right now, so...

I just want to... discover who I am so I think about my life in the recesses. Just kidding. I think about the negative parts in my life because apparently my mind can't think of something else, plus that I am not even trying to stop it.

I am that person in your class that doesn't talk to anyone and doesn't care about anything besides learning, 'cause that's what I was taught to do.
I only talk to someone when I need something from them or they need something from me. It's simple:
no one cares about me, I don't care about anyone.

I kind of hate my classmates anyway, so why would I care about them?
It's simple logic. I am just in that kind of 'teenage period' so don't worry, this will all go away one day. I hope.

Whatever, let's start with the story. I already know that I bored you.

So, the bell rang.

-"Finally! The torture is over!" I said to myself, as I was getting close to the staircase of my school. In case you were wondering, I am in 6th grade. I know, I'm young, but don't think too much about it.

As I was saying, I walked up the staircase to my classroom. Everything was normal, or how I would say: 'boring', as always. There is never something new or out of the ordinary happening. It's all the same.

We all got in the class.

  I was wondering why am I like this, why am I so lonely. Is it because I'm going through puberty or something?
  Is it something else, like depression?

   Before you say it, yes, I self diagnosed. To be honest, I don't believe in myself either.

   I don't know if what I'm experiencing is depression or not.

   Everyday I wake up even more tired than before and I always do the same things everyday. I feel like I got stuck in an endless loop, but it's just my life.

   I don't care about anything anymore. I only care about my phone and having good grades.
   My phone is my everything, it's my way of escaping reality.
    Good grades are everything to my parents, that's all I can say.

  Anyway, "my depression" started when I was about 11. That's when I got my first phone. I discovered YouTube, and since then I only watch that, I don't play any other app.

    My parents weren't so happy about this, since all I was doing all day was play on my phone. They started punishing me. Wheather it would be a week without my phone, a month or a day it didn't matter, I would always cry about it.
    I was, and still am a sensitive person. It's just a part of me.

    Whenever I would get punished, I would go in my backyard and cry for hours, while muttering a lot of nonsense.

    Around that time I was in 5th grade, and it just got more stressful after that.

   I had a best friend at the time, but she left me in a difficult period.
  I should have known that it was too good to be true. I feel like every time something makes me happy it doesn't last long. It's like I'm destined to be sad.

   So, with all the pressure put on me by school, plus my dad finding out I've been crying and telling me how much of a coward I was for doing that and me listening to him, resulted in my "depression".

  I can't even remember all of the nights I wanted to cry but told myself that I wanted to make my dad proud by not crying. It was a painful journey, and when I finally got out of it, I fell back in.

   Only because of an asshole.

- 730 words-