Master Tomlinson

19-Safe

That night was filled with confusion, anger, and sadness. Then again— my entire life was that way when I looked back on it. After that awkward encounter Luke and I had, I could tell that some of the boys had heard us arguing judging by the curious looks I received as I walked back to my room. To my relief, Luke wasn't in there. There would be nothing more awkward than having to go to bed in the same room as someone you just argued with, kissed, and to top it all off— someone who was previously with your current lover, and has possibly made love with, but doesn't actually want him; he wants you. For once in my life, my brain had enough distractions that even the Devil inside my mind was bewildered.

I grabbed a few of my things— a book and clothes for the morning— and went to Louis' room. It wasn't too late at this time and I didn't bother to check if he was in his office, because I wasn't ready to face him after what just happened. I did feel guilty— but I knew that it wasn't my fault. There was no warning given to indicate what was about to happen, and I was already so off guard from his confession that my mind couldn't pull away from the subject of Louis and Luke.
My grip tightened around the book as my mind began to wander back to Luke's words; and all that I seemed to be concerned with was if they had... done what we hadn't. And I also wondered if Louis usually does this with every new boy in the house. Quickly, I tried to erase the thoughts from my mind. This is what he wanted, he wanted me to second guess everything that I already knew. Luke was getting into my head more than I thought he was.

I shook my head gently and opened the door to Louis' room, closing it quietly behind me. The room smelled of his cologne and fresh air from the window being opened. The breeze was nice but since it was getting darker it grew colder, so I shut it before setting my book down on his dresser, then began to change into my night clothes.

It was only an hour later that Louis came to bed, and when he entered I could tell by his delayed greeting that something wasn't right. Slowly, Louis walked over to the side of the bed that I was on and sat down.
"What is it?" I asked worriedly, reaching for his hand. I was starting to wonder if someone had maybe found out something about Luke and I and told Louis, but he didn't pull away. In fact, he smiled tiredly down at me. "You're so cute when you read like that." Louis laughed at my position, the blankets above my chest and to my neck. I was so deep into my book that I had laid down almost completely with the book so close to my face that I could hardly see any of my surroundings, and even when he walked in I had to pull it down completely to peek over it. My smile instantly grew into a dimply grin and I slowly propped myself up on my elbows, setting my open book face down on the other side of the bed so I wouldn't lose my spot. As he stared down at me lovingly with his smile beaming down on me like the sun, I could still see something troubling swimming around in those ocean blue eyes of his.
"I made a decision today that I have to tell you about." Louis whispered to me, attempting to keep his smile just as big but failing.
My green eyes stared back into his now; with concern and also a bit of fear. I gulped nervously. "What?"
Louis paused— he squeezed my hand tightly and pursed his lips, his smile now gone completely. "I... put a hit out for Roy Hutchins for half a million pounds.. Just to try and counteract his hit." The man now let out a small sigh. My brows furrowed in disapproval and I was now sitting up a bit more, frowning up at him. I didn't want him getting this involved, not only because I didn't want him to get hurt— but because it was me that put him in this situation and I would never be able to live with myself if he was injured— or killed over me.
"I don't want you to get hurt because of m—"
"I am choosing that myself," Louis interrupted and spoke a bit louder than me, now squeezing my hand harder, "And there is nothing you can say or do to make me stop."
It was a never ending cycle of Louis doing things for me that might get him in hot water and me trying to refuse it but not succeeding. I also felt obligated to let him do what he wanted because I was still his property even if he didn't acknowledge that.